Soul Intercourse
by The Moiderah of Writing
Summary: Homura and Sayaka are not exactly the epitome of mental health. So obviously, switching their bodies would be an easy way of fixing that, right? Right! A collaboration with Angel0Wonder.
1. Chapter 1

Homura was learning a lot about herself today. She sucked at absolutely everything. And that she couldn't do warm-ups for _beans_.

It wasn't an easy lesson for her to swallow, not by any stretch of the imagination, but it was hard to deny that she was terrible at warm-ups when doing sit-ups left her winded. The shade was doing little to help as she sat under the shadow of a tree. The towel over her head only served to hide herself from the snickering of her classmates. And it wasn't even doing that good a job, either. The near hyperventilating girl could not hear the sound of approaching footsteps over her own wheezing. When the owner of those footsteps announced themselves she nearly passed out from the surprise.

"Oh, sorry! Did I scare you?" was the sheepish response to her near-death experience.

"N-No!" Homura tried desperately to hide her surprise. She wasn't doing a very good job at it. "I-I was just startled!" Her glasses were skewed a little, probably jumbled a bit when she jumped in surprise.

The girl just kind of laughed in a way the braided girl found vaguely patronizing as she plopped herself next to Homura on the grass. "Having a hard time, huh? You looked like a fish out of water out there!"

Homura paused for a second as she tried to think of what to say next. "I-I'm...a little...I'm not doing well," she said, finally.

The other girl, who had short blue hair and a friendly open smile, waved her words away "Yeah, everyone got that. I'm Sayaka, by the way," The girl- Sayaka, apparently- grabbed her hand rather abruptly and shook it. "You see, my friend over there," Sayaka pointed towards a group of students over her shoulder, making Homura squint awkwardly as she tried to figure out who was the one being indicated through her bad eyesight. "Yeah, her." Sayaka sounded proud. "She wants me to help you be as cool as your name."

_That _made Homura blush. "My...my name is _cool?" _She shook her head. "I mean...her?"

"It is pretty cool! Not as cool as my own name, of course," this Sayaka character sounded rather boastful and vibrant, and Homura felt cowed by the familiarity. "So, I guess I could help you out with the athletics stuff. My other friend Hitomi can cover your academics." Sayaka offered easily enough.

"Eh?" Homura felt a little dazed by the sudden offer. "I... I don't..."

"Well, think it over, okay?" Sayaka stood up, brushing herself off. Her attention seemed to be on the teams forming for a sport over by the track. She turned back to the dark haired girl and flashed her a quick radiant smile. "Gotta run, but we could meet up tomorrow again and try those warm-ups again. If you want."

Homura smiled. "I'd love to." She said back.

"You can count on Sayaka-chan!" she proclaimed with a confident salute before she ran off. She had left an impression on Homura that day. Odd, but vaguely hopeful. And now...

[=]

What a cruel joke that girl was. Oh, she was hopeful, alright. Odd, a little. Suicidal?

...Actually, according to Homura, that was probably the most accurate term.

And now Homura was the one standing over a weak and pathetic Sayaka. And the only thing she could count Sayaka on was to screw everything up. Another timeline ruined because of her stupidity. The other girl was glowering at her with dull contempt as she rejected Homura's generous offer to share a grief seed. She'd kicked it away like she'd rather die than accept Homura's charity. That was probably the case.

"Why won't you let me help you?" She said it coldly.

Sayaka didn't say anything back. Homura was beginning to wonder if she suddenly lost the ability to speak.

"Do you really want to die?" She asked. "Do you want to make Madoka suffer?"

Sayaka muttered something under her breath.

"Speak up, Miki." She had less and less patience to waste on this girl with every new timeline.

"It's because I know you're a liar." Those blue eyes just watched her knowingly.

Homura's patience snapped. "..._What_." She forced Sayaka's head up. "What could I _possibly _have to gain by lying to _you, _you _idiot." _

"I don't know," Sayaka's righteous passion flared in her dull eyes for the briefest moment as she met Homura's stare. "But everything you say just feels so fake, like you pretend to care, but you don't. You say you're doing it for my sake, but I know you have some sort of agenda. Don't you?"

Homura paused for a moment. She looked at the ground and grit her teeth, before she turned back to Sayaka. "I want Madoka safe. I want her _happy." _

"What does that have to do with me?" Sayaka asked. "What does Madoka have to do with this anyway?"

"It has _everything_ to do with Madoka." Homura's shield materialized on her arm and her fingers brushed the skin of Sayaka's neck, making the other girl shiver noticeably since she doubtless felt Homura's icy intentions. "And if your existence makes her suffer any longer...Then I'll end you." Homura's hand found it's way around Sayaka's throat. "Right here, right now, Sayaka Miki."

Her purple soul gem flashed violently as she squeezed with every intention to fulfill her promise, reflecting the brief fear in Sayaka's eyes. But then Sayaka's soul gem flashed with a brilliant light as if in response and they were both blind sided by the effect.

In that second it was like a bolt of lightning struck in between them, sending their bodies flying in opposite directions. Sayaka rolled across the ground like a ragdoll, and Homura was sent hurtling into a nearby car and giving it a nice large dent. They both coughed, both pained and somewhat shocked by the sudden backlash.

"What the-" Homura's body murmured, before she started looking around. "My back _hurts..." _She muttered, before she slowly forced herself out of the dented steel. She rubbed her back, before she noticed something weird. There was _hair _there. Last time she checked, she didn't have a hairy back...wait. No, she didn't have hair that _long. _She brought in front of her, when she noticed that the hair was _black. _And that her hands had _purple _cufflets on them. She looked forwards, when she noticed Sayaka lying on the ground. Her eyes grew wide, and her jaw hung in shock.

Sayaka was having her own bit of fun from recovering after the tumble. She coughed a little, and picked herself off of the ground. It was then that she noticed someone standing by a very heavily damaged car. She stared at the other body, before she started saying something slowly. "I..."

"Are..." Homura's body stared for several more seconds. "...H-Homura?"

"Y...Sayaka?"

"We...don't..." Homura's right eye twitched. "Did we..."

"That's stupid." Sayaka said. "That's stupid and impossible and..." She started murmuring to herself.

"Then why am I in _your _body?!" Sayaka's exclamation flew out of Homura's mouth.

"This can't be happening," Homura whispered from Sayaka's lips. The blue hair hanging in front of her face made Homura's heart rate triple as she tried to make sense of what the hell just happened between their souls.

They had actually _switched_ bodies.

How? Why? This has never happened before. Blindly Homura reached for her shield only to find it wasn't there. Her foreign white gloved hand groped at air and her head snapped up, looking at the surprised and distressed face of her original body. Then her now blue eyes honed in on her trademark shield that was on her - _Sayaka's_- arm.

And so, they both screamed, and promptly failed to realize that someone else was walking in on their fantastic little scream-session. "I heard a 'bang'!" Kyouko shouted. "What the hell's going on here?"

The sudden appearance of the red magical girl startled them both and Sayaka hesitated before she turned and ran in the opposite direction. Homura caught a glimpse of the panicked despair washing over the other girl's features and her heart sank.

"Stop!" Homura called out in a voice not her own. She tried to bolt after Sayaka, but she stumbled as her legs failed her. Homura grunted in confusion as a dull throbbing pain stabbed her soul gem and she observed with a curious disgust that she had not only inherited Sayaka's body, but the mucky state of her soul as well.

Kyouko ran over to her, kneeling in concern. "What the hell is going on, Sayaka? Did that crazy bitch do anything to you?"

"I'm not Sayaka, I'm the crazy bitch." Homura spat out in annoyance.

"Huh?"

"She's the crazy b-b-_one_!" Sayaka shouted from a safe distance. "She tried to kill _me!"_

Homura turned back to Sayaka with an annoyed face. "You were being irrational!"

"_You_ had your hands around my throat! Because you're _crazy!_"

"_Huh?_" Kyouko looked back and forth between them in confusion. "I'm going to kick both of your asses if you two don't start making sense!"

"I'm _Sayaka!_" Homura's body shouted in a panic. She grabbed at her now long dark hair and started talking to herself. "We're just empty husks, don't you see? Our souls can just be shuffled around like nothing! I bet I can insert my soul into a stuffed animal now like some shonen manga!"

Kyouko turned to Homura, ignoring the now ranting girl. "So... Let me get this straight, _you're_ Homura? In Sayaka's body?" Homura glowered darkly at her and Kyouko pinched the bridge of her nose in exasperation at this new problem. "Jesus fucking christ..."

Homura's eyes found the grief seed that Sayaka had kicked away before and started sluggishly shuffling towards it, teeth grit. "Get Sayaka before she rips out any more of my hair."

"Prove it," Kyouko said seriously. "Say something only Homura would know."

Homura resisted the urge to groan. She did not have time for this. "I wear purple-striped panties."

Kyouko looked like her brain blew a gasket. "I..._wha?"_

"Check them." Homura said, nonchalantly. "Purple stripes. Exclusively."

Kyouko turned to Sayaka. "I..."

"I am _not _going to check for that!" Sayaka said. "Just..._no. _That's..._no"_

"Well, I'll just have to check for yours, then." Homura grabbed the frills of Sayaka's skirt.

"What?!" Sayaka shouted. "No! Don't you _dare-!" _It's then that she stopped, before she smirked. "...You know what? Go ahead. It's not like you'll see anything."

Homura raised an eyebrow. "Really?"

"I wear shorts under those." She says. "Just try it! My magical girl uniform has _short-shorts _instead of _panties _under the skirt!"

At this point, poor, blushing, ignored Kyouko was pinching the bridge of her nose so tightly that she swore that blood was just going to go spurting out of it. "Stop! Okay! Fine! I believe you!" She groaned. "Holy shit, _fucking stop_."

Homura finally reached the grief seed and put it against her gem. She sighed as the corruption flowed out. She had to fix... whatever happened. She had to fix it. Her mind went through what had occurred before the switch. She had been about to strangle Sayaka. If she replicated the experience, in theory it might produce results.

Sayaka's eyes widened slightly, as if she had picked up Homura's line of thinking. Perhaps she had? Who knew what else they were capable of now that they were in each other's bodies!

"No." Sayaka already had her hands raised. "No, you are _not _going to-!"

"Hold still for a second." Homura started walking to Sayaka quickly. "I just want to repli-"

"_No." _Sayaka started shaking her hands.

"It will only take a s-"

"_NO." _She was waving them wildly now, and Homura was just about to grab Sayaka's throat.

It was then that Kyouko stepped in-between them, arms outstretched with two spears aimed squarely at their heads. "Okay, that's enough of _that _bullshit!" She turned to Sayaka. "You! Calm down!" And she glared at Homura. "You! Stop trying to strangle yourself!"

Homura's first instinct was to stop time and walk past Kyouko's spear to continue with her plan, but... Since she didn't have her shield, she didn't have access to that power at all. She could not sense it with her. She felt even more frustrated as her concern grew over this predicament. If she didn't have access to her powers it meant that would not be able to reverse time.

And if she could not reverse time, then...

Something inside of her snapped. She looked at Sayaka, then at the spear right in front of her, then at Kyouko, then back at Sayaka, then at Kyouko, then the spear, then Sayaka, then the spear, then Sayaka, then Kyouko then the spear then Kyouko then Sayaka then-

She screamed, shoved the spear out of the way, charged past a surprised Kyouko, and grabbed Sayaka's neck with as much force as she could muster. She could feel Sayaka underneath her hands, trying to wrestle her way out of Homura's vice-like grip. She rammed Sayaka against a concrete pillar and cracked it. Slowly, she dragged her up, lifting Sayaka's feet off the ground as the other girl struggled fruitlessly.

But in her blind rage, she failed to notice Kyouko recovering. In the seconds that it took to get her hands around her own body's neck, Kyouko had grabbed another spear. Kyouko struck Homura in the back of the head _hard_, and knocked her out instantly.

Sayaka dropped to the ground shakily, hurriedly shoving her unconscious body away from herself as she breathed rapidly. She and Kyouko looked at each other for a few silent moments before Kyouko walked over and picked Homura up by the scruff of her cape.

"Well," she said as she started dragging her away. "At least we know_ that_ didn't switch you two back."

It took a few seconds before Sayaka's mind caught up to the conversation and she scrambled to her feet. "Hey! Where are you taking my body!"

Kyouko paused for a moment as if in thought. As she did that she bent over to properly pick up the body and sling it over her shoulder. "Homura's secret bat cave, I guess. Or I can take your body back to my hotel!" Kyouko suggested with a waggle of her eyebrows.

"You're not taking my body anywhere!" Sayaka said angrily. Kyouko rolled her eyes and dropped Homura like a sack of potatoes.

"You know what? You're right, it's your body, so it's your problem. Have fun with that." Kyouko said casually as she started walking away, annoyed by Sayaka's attitude as ever. The blue haired girl stumbled on Homura's heels as she hurried over to the unconscious form.

"... Crap." she muttered. She really had no better ideas on where to go from here. Kyouko had said something about... Homura's bat cave? Was she serious, did Homura have a _cave_? Actually, it wouldn't surprise Sayaka that much. "Kyouko!" she hollered after the redhead after a brief internal debate. Kyouko stopped and looked over her shoulder with a smirk. "...Where is this bat cave?" she asked reluctantly.

Kyouko sighed, but she couldn't wipe that smirk off of her face. "Alright, I'll show you."

[=]

"Oh god, it _is _a bat cave." Sayaka stared in awe at all the holograms, diagrams, and various kinds of grams scattered around the place, right down to a few graham crackers set up on a saucer, which was set next to a cup of coffee.

Sayaka looked at the cup, before she noticed that the mix was pitch-black and that the smell was _strong. _It seemed less like a cup of normal black coffee and much more like a cup full of espresso shot after espresso shot poured repeatedly to make one disgusting cup of godawful "coffee".

"That's what I said." Kyouko huffed as she dumped a groaning Homura onto the nearest flat surface. "You should see her Homura mobile."

Sayaka's eyes bugged out. "Does she really have one?!"

Kyouko looked at her with a slowly growing jackass grin. "... No. Not that I know of, anyway. She hasn't exactly given me the grand tour of the place."

Sayaka's eyes were drawn to one of the holograms that looked like a shot of Madoka's house. Were these some sort of surveillance magic things? Thoroughly creeped out, Sayaka turned away to frown at the stirring form. She lightly touched her neck, still feeling the dull ache. Homura's body didn't heal as fast as she was used to.

"Should we tie her up or something..?"

"Kinky." Kyouko commented, lightly slapping Homura's cheeks. "You wanna tie yourself up?"

"What? _No!" _Sayaka shook her head. "I just...she...security..._strangle-!"_

"I know what you were talking about, hotshot." Kyouko deadpanned. "It was just an easy joke."

Sayaka sighed in relief.

"Besides, I doubt that'll be necessary." Kyouko muttered not quite certainly, taking Homura's cheeks and pulling them apart comically. She giggled.

"Stop doing things to my face!" Sayaka stalked over to stop her when Homura beat her to the punch. Literally, she punched Kyouko right in the face. Kyouko's hands flew to her face as she cursed.

"That was for knocking me out earlier," Homura said as she sat up.

Sayaka started sputtering. "B-B-But just a second ago you were out cold!"

"I was faking it for the past five minutes." She said, calmly. "Thank you for bringing me home, by the way."

"What the fuck is your problem?!" Kyouko checked her nose. "...Great. My nose's bleeding."

"Good. You deserved it." Homura brushed off her knuckles. "My punches have a lot more force behind them now." she observed curiously.

"You fucking think?" Kyouko moved her soul gem closer to her face. "Awugh...fuck, it hurts."

"You broke a concrete pillar." Sayaka said, flatly. "And my neck still hurts."

Homura nodded and let her feet touch the floor with a turn. "How long was I out?"

"Well, you missed the Walpurgis attack and we're all that's left, Sunshine. Thanks for that." Kyouko said dead seriously as her nose healed up.

Homura stared in shock and terror. "I...no. _N-!"_

"I'm joking." Kyouko said, flatly. "It was a fucking joke. Really, it was just over an hour."

Homura nearly strangled her. But strangling people seemed to be the source of her problems today, so she held off. Instead she counted to a million in her head to calm herself down and took a deep breath. "That wasn't a very funny joke." She said, calmly.

"It was to me." Kyouko said with a shrug. "But then again, I'm kind of a sick puppy." And with that, Sayaka slapped the back of Kyouko's head. "Goddammit, you people need to stop hitting me," Kyouko complained with a glare.

"And you need to stop being a terrible person." Sayaka retorted. "And what did you mean by a walrus attack?"

"Exactly what it sounds like. The walruses are rising up against humanity and me and Homura were going to take a stand." Kyouko refused to learn her lesson, apparently.

Both Homura and Sayaka just stared at her, with her jaw hanging, her eyes squinted, and her head tilted just slightly to convey the sheer amount of confusion that she was feeling.

When she finally recovered, Homura was the first to do something. She grabbed Kyouko by the face, and shoved her to the side with enough force to send her flipping over a nearby chair. "Walpurgis is something that you shouldn't concern yourself with. It's important, but it's none of your business."

Sayaka frowned at that. "If you think you're going to be dealing with it in my body, you're even crazier than I thought."

Homura froze at that, before she shook her head. "I'll find a way."

"Great, because I trust you _so_ much!" Sayaka said with her heaviest spiteful sarcasm. There was an awful overbearing silence in the huge room after she said that. The two girls glared scathingly at each other before a small white figure wandered in silently between them.

"My, what a problem you two have encountered," Kyubey commented. Homura felt a chill creepy down her spine. Even with his supposed lack of emotion, he still managed to sound like a smug little bastard. "I can't say that I haven't encountered this before, but it's such a rarity that I can't help but notice it!"

"...You've encountered this before?" Sayaka sounded confused.

"Oh, yes." He said. "It's rare, but it has happened."

"Then how do we reverse it?" Homura cut straight to the problem. Kyubey turned his head to her, ears flopping as he did.

"Unfortunately, all the cases of this happening have ended in despair, or worse." he said lightly as he sat down on his haunches and rubbed his head against his own fluffy tail. Homura's blood ran cold. "So I am not aware that a way to reverse this condition exists!" Sayaka and Homura stared at him in horror. "It'll be interesting to see if you two fare any better, but I seriously doubt it-" Kyubey was cut off as a spearhead went through his head. Kyouko glared distastefully at the body at the end of her weapon.

"Remind me to never ask this thing anything again."

"Wh-what did he mean by 'despair, or worse'?" Sayaka asked quietly, not sure if she wanted to know the answer. Homura shakily attempted to flip her hair but failed. Both Sayaka and Kyouko were looking at her, and she heaved a deep sigh. Images of Witches sprang to her mind and all her battles against them. Sayaka's eyes widened slowly as she stared at Homura.

Homura's eyes widened as well as she stared back. No, it couldn't be... Not without Kyubey, at least. Right? 'Can... can you hear me?' Homura thought deliberately at Sayaka. There was a few seconds of tense silence until Homura relaxed slightly, breathing an internal sigh of relief. She must have been imagining things-

'Yes.'

She jumped at that with a yelp, with Sayaka following suit. 'You can hear my thoughts?!'

'Y-Yeah! I can see them, too!' It's then that Sayaka pauses. 'Wait...is that...'

'No...no you're not allowed to see that!'

'Oh my god! You want to _what? _With _Madoka?!'_

'That's not okay! It is not okay for you to poke around my head like tha-!'

'With _Mami?! _What is _wrong _with you?!'

Kyouko stood still, looking at both of them as the clock overhead quietly ticked away. She looked to Sayaka on her left, then Homura on her right, before she shrugged and started walking off. "Welp, that's enough weirdness for me. I'm heading out. Don't fuck each other too hard." She slammed the door, and left them both to their mental conversation.

[=]

**[MOID A/N]: Well, this is Angel0Wonder's brainchild here, so you can blame her for that. So yeah! Decided to try doing a collab fic. Because, hey, mite b coo. And so far, it is! She's fun to work with and it's just kind of a blast. Look forward to more of this fic...eventually. Hopefully, sooner rather than later. Because fuckin'...stuff and stuff.**

**[A0W A/N]: I've had this idea forever, and it's finally here because Moid is a cool guy who is ten times more productive than I am! He makes work fun. And fast. And stuff. Good stuff. More good stuff to come!**


	2. Chapter 2

**[CHAPTER 2]**

Homura and Sayaka sat in silence on the couch, faced in different directions. Sayaka, in Homura's body, sat in a fetal position, with her arms wrapped around her legs. Homura, in Sayaka's body, had her arms crossed, but her eyes trained on the floor.

Sayaka opened her mouth. "...So...you're a time traveler?"

Homura stayed quiet.

"...You know, I kind of already know." She said, bluntly.

Homura frowned. "...Yes." She said. "I am."

"And... you're trying to save Madoka from becoming a magical girl?"

"Yes."

Sayaka let out a shaky breath and pressed her forehead to her knees. Going through Homura's head had been a mind-shattering process. At first Homura was very opposed to showing Sayaka anything, but as Sayaka kept digging up new and more horrifying tidbits of information, the more Homura reluctantly opened up her mind to her. It was like a torture session of memories for the past couple of hours for Sayaka.

"And I... I turn into a witch." That wasn't a question as much as it was a miserable statement. For the umpteenth time in the past week, Sayaka's view of the world was shaken to its very core.

"Yes." Homura confirmed. She let her mind linger on Oktavia Von Seckendorff and Sayaka flinched.

Homura had felt uncertain and somewhat nervous as she allowed Sayaka to delve through her memories. Afterall, the last time she had shared anything with the short haired girl, she hadn't believed her at all. Homura could still feel the raw hurt and anger at having been called out as a liar by this girl. Because of that she had decided to never rely on anyone again, and she's stuck to that pretty damn well so far. But, it seemed that Sayaka was accepting the truth about this world, this system, and herself. She just hoped it wasn't going to blow up in her face.

"I think I'm going to be sick." said Sayaka.

"Not on my bed." Homura's tone was flat.

"Oh, funny." Sayaka didn't sound amused. "...So I can't exactly blame you for not trusting me."

"You're a ticking time bomb." Homura looked over her shoulder. "Trusting you is like trusting a tank of kerosene."

Sayaka said nothing to defend herself. Honestly, she felt like she deserved worse. Her best friend had been in danger all this time, and she had been too blind to realize it time and time again. It was almost too much for her to process at this moment.

Homura sighed. "Do you feel terrible yet?"

"More than you know." Sayaka frowned. "...God, I'm such an _idiot." _

"I think that's the only thing we've ever agreed on." Homura said idly as she went back to looking ahead. She hoped Sayaka could get over herself quicker. There was so much to be done.

Sayaka gulped thickly and forced herself out of her fetal position. "So... what now?" she asked, sitting up and putting on her brave face.

Homura raised an eyebrow. Sayaka was actually asking her for directions? This was new. "We fix us." she stated flatly. "After that, you're free to be someone else's problem."

Sayaka felt annoyed by that. "Madoka is my best friend," she said, her pulse feeling stronger with a clear purpose. "I'll help. With Walpurgis."

Homura exhaled through her nose. "Of course you will." she growled. "But first, I need my body back."

"Somehow, I don't think that's going to happen." Sayaka says. "Now, we're going to have to work with each other. Like...get to know our bodies better."

"... That sounds like a terrible idea."

"If you have anything better in mind, feel free to share!"

Homura opened her mouth, but then she stopped. "...I don't."

"Good. So the 'getting to know our bodies better' bit is a go?"

"I never said that."

"You implied it."

"Just because I couldn't find a better solution doesn't mean that there _isn't _one."

Sayaka ran a hand through her hair, marveling at the length and silkiness of it. "Look, I don't want to stay in your body either, but we don't exactly have a lot of time, right?"

Homura had dismissed the idea long ago that Sayaka could be a reasonable person, but she could acknowledge the point Sayaka was trying to make now. She found her biggest problem with that solution however, was the prospect of having to count on the one person she couldn't. It wasn't exactly a mental hurdle she could leap just because they switched bodies.

"How long do we have?" She paused. "Wait...three weeks." She froze. "..._Three weeks?"_

"You said it yourself. We don't exactly have a lot of time. We're lucky that we even have that much of it." Homura says. "Do you think you can survive in my shoes for three weeks?"

Sayaka peered down at Homura's heels. "I mean, I'm not used to heels, but I'm sure I can manage?" Homura resisted the urge to facepalm.

"At least one of us is confident." She muttered. "In the meantime...I need to make sure that your parents don't start trying to call the cops."

Sayaka winced at that. "Yeah... Yeah, they'll be worried." She reached for her phone and was momentarily confused on why she couldn't find it on her. When she looked up she saw Homura was holding up the device in her hand and was waiting for Sayaka to realize the obvious. "Oh, thanks," Sayaka reached for her phone, but Homura pulled it back.

"It'll be strange if your parents hear a completely different voice, don't you think?"

"... Right." Sayaka said in an annoyed tone. "But then... Wouldn't you need to stay at my place?"

Homura froze. "I...uh..." That wasn't something Homura had taken into consideration and it showed on her face. The thought of spending the next three weeks preparing for Walpurgisnacht while holed up in Sayaka's apartment with actual _parents_ was far too ridiculous for her to consider. "Hm."

Sayaka watched her own face in fascination as it went from stone cold to increasingly uncertain in these last few moments. 'Do I always look that dumb?' she thought to herself. Or she _thought_ she thought to herself.

Homura wanted to answer 'Yes' to that question, but she didn't like to think that Sayaka's idiotic face was now her own. Actually, it was rather depressing if she kept thinking about it. So instead she shot Sayaka an annoyed glare before huffing slightly. "It won't be possible for me to live at your apartment. It would be too much of a hindrance to my plans." Even more of a hindrance than the whole switching bodies thing.

"I heard _that _thought," Sayaka shot back. "And I think your plans are pretty much kaput."

"Then I make new plans," Homura said. "And going there is _still _a hindrance."

Sayaka sighed and put her hand to her chin as she tried to think of a way her parents could approve her her staying with someone else for several weeks... maybe even longer if they never figured out how to switch back. She shoved that thought away. last thing she needed right now was for her thoughts to take even more depressing turns down suicide lane.

"Gimme my phone," Sayaka snatched her phone back from Homura's hand and quickly dialed her parent's phone while an impromptu idea took form in her mind. Homura didn't stop her, wondering what Sayaka had in mind. She could only feel a sense of purpose from Sayaka's mind rather than an actual idea. Figured Sayaka rarely had actual thoughts!

Sayaka gulped as several rings later someone picked up the phone.

"Hello?" Sayaka's mother answered.

Sayaka cleared her throat. "Hello, Mrs... Miki?" Sayaka had deepened Homura's voice slightly, making the other girl cringe a little. "I'm calling regarding your daughter's recent academic failures?"

"... My daughter isn't home right now, I really don't want to hear about this."

"Oh, your daughter is right here! She had to be held back for some... lecturing." Sayaka turned to Homura expectantly, as if giving her a cue. Homura just said the first thing to come to mind.

"I'm a huge idiot." Sayaka narrowed her eyes at her in annoyance.

"Oh," Sayaka's mother sounded relieved to hear her daughter's voice. "Well, next time call me if you need to hold her back. What was this about failing?"

"I'm sure you're aware that finals are three weeks from now, yes?" Sayaka twirled an imaginary mustache. "There's this new... program! To tutor students who are failing. It involves studying all day, everyday to guarantee success for your kid!"

Mrs. Miki gasped. "Oh, so you can help her, huh?"

"More than help!" Sayaka laid it on thick, and Homura wondered if anyone would actually buy this load of crap. "If you let us have Sayaka for three weeks up until the finals, she'll ace it! Thing is, we need your permission for us to keep her!"

"Sounds perfectly reasonable!" Homura nearly fell out of her chair.

"Fantastic!" Sayaka was grinning as she succeeded. "We'll need to keep her here overnight for the next three weeks, of course. So she can come by to pick up her clothes, but then its off to vigorous studying! And stuff!"

"Oh, alright. I'll arrange her suitcase for her then. I don't believe I got your name..?"

"Uh, my name?" Sayaka looked at Homura for help but the other girl didn't give her any. "Homu... Kemi. Homu Kemi, head of tutors at your service!"

"Oh dear god." Homura muttered under her breath. This was the most painful phone conversation ever.

"Thank you, Mrs. Kemi!" The voice on the other end said, cheerily. "I hope to talk to you again!" She, mercifully, hung up right there.

Homura just stared at Sayaka. "...What the hell do they feed your family? Gullible soup?"

"...Bite me." Sayaka said back. "She probably knows that I was lying."

"So if she does give you stuff to stay here..." Homura made a face. "...Oh god, she's assuming-"

"What?" Sayaka asked, before it dawned on her. "Ugh! No!" She stopped. "I-I mean, n-not that there's anything wrong with you for liking that, b-but I...ugh..._fff-!" _Her face turned a bright red.

"I know what you meant." Homura said. "You don't need to act like you're stepping on my toes."

"Sounded...uh..."

"I know how it sounded. And, as I just said, I know what you meant. Shut up."

Sayaka did just that, and rather awkwardly. It was still weird for her, the thought that Homura had... _feelings_ for her best friend. It was just so seemingly out of left field. Sayaka was no stranger to issues of love, but Homura's situation was just... so ridiculously epic, compared to Sayaka's experience. She was kind of intimidated by it. How would Madoka react if she knew?

The thought of Madoka also made a pang of guilt present itself in her chest. The last time she saw her, she had said some rather awful things to her. Things that was extremely ashamed about. She should apologize.

Homura noticed Sayaka fiddling with her phone again. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going to call Madoka," Sayaka murmured distractedly.

Homura's brows furrowed as she brushed her bangs out of her eyes. "And what makes you think that's a good idea?"

"We can't just hide this from her!" Sayaka shouted. "I mean, she's gonna figure out eventually!"

"And what would telling her now accomplish, other than worrying her?" Homura clenched her teeth. "Do you know what she'll do?"

"What do you think she's gonna do?" Sayaka said back.

"She. Would. Make. A. Wish." Homura said it slowly, coldly. "She would throw away her life, just to fix a problem that I..._we _caused."

"Yeah, well," Sayaka sputtered uselessly for a moment. "We could always _tell_ her not to!"

Homura blinked. Then she laughed. Long and hard. "Yes, that will solve all my problems! Just tell her not to. Brilliant, Sayaka Miki, just brilliant."

Sayaka's hand tightened around her phone, practically cracking it. "I'm just saying-"

"You never say anything of worth, so please. Shut. UP."

"No!" Sayaka was angry now. "No, _you _shut up!"

"Why should I shut up? I'm the only one making any damn _sense _around here!"

"Yeah, but you're _crazy!"_

"I'm still being reasonable."

"But you're still _crazy!"_

"And you're an ignorant, self-absorbed fool!" Homura snapped. She had a short patience fuse with this person.

"Self absorbed? _I'm_ self absorbed?" Sayaka sounded incredulous. "That's rich coming from you! You're not honest with anyone, and you don't even care if the rest of us die as long as you save Madoka!"

"I have no choice!" Homura couldn't believe she had to justify herself to the one person she never wanted to have this conversation with.

"Keep telling yourself that! But you know what- I'm glad we switched bodies, 'cause now I know! Maybe now_ I_ can save Madoka from her fate!"

Something inside Homura broke. "You?! Save _her?! _You can't even save _yourself! _You get yourself killed _time and again _for some _fucking boy."_

"And you put yourself through hell time and again for some f-f-_girl. _And she is my _friend." _Sayaka was just as livid. "She is my _best friend." _

It occurred to Sayaka a little late that picking a fight with a person who had _that _sort of look in their eyes and who had attempted to strangle her just a few hours ago wasn't the greatest idea ever... But screw that! If Homura thought Sayaka was going to back down from her, she was sorely mistaken!

Homura's hands were clenching so tight she felt satisfied to leave marks in Sayaka's palms. "You keep saying that. Do you enjoy rubbing that in my face?" Her words got caught in her throat slightly but she forced them out.

"Do you think I don't know that? Do you think I don't see how she comes closer and closer to seeing me as a monster while the true monster sits in front of me and gets to call herself Madoka's '_best friend'_?" Homura's eyes shined briefly with hatred, and Sayaka could feel her own memories being pulled apart in her head, how Homura was seeing how she had essentially told Madoka to fuck off earlier. "Yeah. Some best friend you are." She might as well have stabbed Sayaka repeatedly in the chest.

Their little staredown was interrupted violently, when they both felt another presence. A witch was close; they could feel it. They didn't stop staring at each other, though. There wasn't a good enough reason not to.

"This isn't over." Homura said, coldly.

"No. It isn't." They rushed out of the room, the urge to destroy something on the forefront of both of their minds.

[=]

It was warm in here; warmer than it had any right to be. In the background, both Homura and Sayaka could see mountains of rust and steel. Smoke and steam rose into the sky, with a broken platinum sun at the center of it.

"Don't get in my way." Homura said, before her collar was caught by Sayaka.

"Don't get in your way? You don't know the first _thing _about my body!"

"So? I saw your memories." She said. "I can figure this out."

"No, you can't." Sayaka frowned. Heck, _she _hasn't even figured everything out about her own powers!

"Oh? I can't?" Homura spawned a sword without thinking about it. She caught it without looking, and she flung her cape around. "It's easy."

"Not so much." Sayaka said. "I mean...I can form weapons with your body, too." It was then that she froze. "Wait...what weapon do you use, even?"

"The shield. Nothing else." Homura turned away.

"Wait, _really?" _Sayaka stared at the thing on her arm. "How the heck do you _fight _with this thing?"

"Easily." She said. "Now stay behind me." Homura started walking alone through the mountains of metal.

Sayaka just groaned. "Okay, fine." She kept close.

In a nearby corner, Homura noticed something. She stared at it for several good seconds, before she shook her head. "Let's keep moving." She walked off, with Sayaka close behind.

Sayaka recoiled at the sight. "...Oh god." She saw two bodies, with organs made of clockwork and bones of steel. "...That's horrible." She said.

"Don't stop moving."

Sayaka shook her head and walked forwards. "Okay, okay."

As they walked, the bodies grew more and more plentiful. It was a junkyard of metallic humans, ruined, broken and coated in oil. Sayaka felt chills as she moved through it, and Homura just made a confirming noise. "...So that's what this witch does."

"Is that all you can think about?!" Sayaka shouted. "You're so _flippant _about this!"

"Calm down." Homura said.

"Calm down? _Calm down?! _There are _bodies _everywhere! And they were once _people! _How can you be so accepting?"

"Because otherwise, it will hear us. Now _calm down."_

Sayaka stopped, and bit her lip. She took a deep breath, but she didn't stop glaring at Homura. "...You disgust me."

"You're an idiot if you think that I care." Homura said. "Now let's...oh."

"Oh?" Sayaka snickered bitterly. "What's surprising you?"

"...I saw something moving."

Sayaka turned to where Homura was looking. "I don't see anything."

"I did." She raised a hand. "Don't make a sound."

They stood still. The only thing that broke the silence was the moaning wind, with the occasional groaning steel and crashing metal. Eventually, though, they both heard something. Homura pulled a sword out, and Sayaka grabbed something out of the shield; a full RPG.

Homura's eyes almost bugged out of her skull. "What are you doing?" She hissed.

"I...oh man." Sayaka grinned sheepishly. The weapon dropped to the ground. "I...uh...I don't know how to hold this thing."

Homura blinked. "You can see my memories, right?"

"Yes, but I still don't know how to use it! I mean..." It was then that the metal shifted again.

"Give me that." Homura said. She picked it up with one hand (She noticed that it was _exceptionally _easy to do) and adjusted it over Sayaka's shoulder. "There. Now pull the trigger and watch things die."

It was then that the body pile shifted again. Sayaka shot the rocket launcher right there, with Homura _right next to it. _She screamed a little as some of the rocket's exhaust scorched her hair.

"Sorry!" Sayaka shouted.

Homura just sighed. "First time's hard." She said.

The rocket slammed into the pile, before it exploded, raining bits of steel everywhere. "...Is there anything there?" Sayaka asked.

Homura sucked air in through her teeth and looked at the smoldering pile. "...No. There's nothing." She muttered. It was then that her eyes widened. "...I don't think that's just a pile, though."

Sayaka blinked. "...I don't follow."

"I think that the _piles _are a part of her." Homura said. Horror creeped up on both of them. "We're _surrounded _by the witch. We're _standing right inside of her._"

The piles sprung to life just as she said that, and both Sayaka and Homura leaped out of the center at just the right moment. Homura landed on a nearby mountain with enough force to put a dent in its peak, while Sayaka stumbled a bit on the landing. "I'm _not _used to this! Your body is _weak!" _

"Shut up and don't get hit!" Homura shouted, as the pile shifted and twisted. A mouth formed in the center, before it let out a horrible, muffled groan. It changed and warped, as the groan turned into a high-pitched scream.

And that was when Sayaka made one of her wiser decisions.

"Where are you going?" Homura shouted.

"I need to figure out what I'm doing!" She shouted. "Your body's too weak! I can't just wing it!"

Homura just glared at her, before a tentacle of metal slammed into her torso and took out a chunk of the mountain with it in an explosion of rust. It flowed past her, clenched into a ball, and pulled her back into the piles.

Sayaka stared in horror, before she tried pulling something else out in desperation. She whipped out a .22 caliber pistol and fired twice...and that was it. She stared at the tiny little pea-shooter in her hand, and she stared at the monster above her. She smiled sheepishly, before she started running the other way. "How does she _fight _like this?!"

"How does she fight like _this?!" _Homura was in the middle of a maelstrom of steel and metal. She slashed a pair of sword around madly, with one slash by a pair before she hit some more pieces of steel. "I can't...!" She whipped her cape around, and made several more swords. With each one, she threw it into the storm, before, on reflex, she attempted to pull out a pipe bomb.

She just pulled out another sword and threw it into another part of the witch, and watched at it was pitifully torn apart. She muttered to herself. "...I hate everything."

Sayaka's head was clenched by the beast, and she struggled. "It hurts!" She shouted. "I...I can't feel my _neck!" _She pulled out another weapon and tried shooting it. When she cut herself, she realized that she had just tried shooting a _knife. _"Why?!"

Homura pressed against the metal, before several bits of it started digging into her skin. She screeched in pain and resisted as much as she could, with the ball growing smaller with each passing second. She opened her eyes, only to realize that it was starting to cut her down to the _bone. _"How...how am I still holding on?" She said quietly, before she pressed harder. "Come on!"

Sayaka tried stabbing at the metal, before she tossed the knife away. "Worthless-!" She tried pulling something else out...and this thing felt a lot weightier. "Okay...let's see..." She pulled the trigger with one hand.

She was surprised by the recoil, and then the arm just fell apart after several shots. When she fell, she finally saw what was in her arms; a nice automatic shotgun. "Now _that's _more like it!" She hit the ground with a three-point landing, complete with several tons of metal falling right behind her. "...Now where's Homura?" She turned her head, just in time to hear screaming among the sounds of clanging metal. "...That answers that."

Homura made a sword that was as long as she was tall, and plunged it into the steel. She pressed herself against the hilt, and she let the creature cut itself onto it. To her surprise, it worked. The witch cried out in pain and let her drop out of it. She hit the ground flat on her back, with the wind taken right out of her. "Sh...shit..." She muttered, before she tried picking herself up. "H-how does she fight like this?"

"Heads up!" Homura turned her attention to the voice, just in time to see Sayaka rushing up over a mountain with a weapon in hand.

Homura's eyes widened when she saw that it was that AA-12 she stole a while ago. "Sayaka!?"

Sayaka slammed into a flat surface on the metal monster, and started firing on contact. In just a few seconds, she spent all of her ammunition, obliterating chunk after chunk of the witch before she dropped down, fully spent. She tossed the gun away. "I'm out."

"What are you _doing?" _

"I ran out of ammo, so I'm throwing the guns away." Sayaka said.

"Don't _do _that!" Homura shouted. "That's not the only drum I have!"

"Oh, it isn't?" Sayaka tilted her head. "Huh."

"Dammit!" It was then that the rest of the witch fell to the ground, shuddering and screaming. Homura clenched her teeth and made herself a sword. "...I'll take care of this."

"No you won't." Sayaka grinned. "I'll take care of..." She whipped out the gun, still on a power high. _"This!" _She tried firing a golf club. "...Oh."

The witch charged forwards and Sayaka threw the club right at it. At this moment, Homura just sighed, and grabbed the shield on Sayaka's left arm. And finally, everything stopped. Sayaka looked around, and then at the witch itself. "I...what?"

"You should have known I could do this." Homura said, flatly. "I'm not letting go."

"Why not?" Sayaka raised an eyebrow.

"Because otherwise, the timestop will get me, too." She said, flatly. "You could have done this the entire time, you know."

Sayaka just made a little "Oh" sound. "...So that's why you're so weak otherwise. Man, this is _broken."_

"Shut up." Homura walked up with her hand on Sayaka's arm, before she sliced the witch apart with a free sword. Calmly, she walked out of the way, and hit Sayaka's shield in one fluid motion.

Time restarted, and the witch kept charging forwards in several pieces. It flew apart because of its own momentum, before a single Grief Seed tumbled out of the middle of it and onto the ground. The maze disintegrated around them, and Homura picked up the seed with one free hand. "...Done." She said. "And it would have gone a lot quicker if you actually knew how to use my shield."

"Yeah? Well, you wouldn't have..." Sayaka's eyes widened. "I can see _bone!"_

"...Oh?" Homura looked at her arms. "...Oh. I forgot about that."

"I can see _bone! _What did you do to my body?!"

"Calm down."

"Calm down? I can see bone! Right through my arms!"

"I can fix it, just give me a few minutes." Homura said.

"How can you be so calm about all of this!"

Homura groaned. This was going to be a _long _three weeks.

[=]

**[MOID A/N]: And so, a thinly veiled excuse to write an action sequence. YEH. But seriously, _Tetsuo: The Iron Man_ is a great influence. Good movie? Depends on how willing you are to put up with _Eraserhead_. Also, more dialogue because Angel0Wonder. And Moid. Working together. WILL THE WORLD SURVIVE? (yes probably actually they're not really all that much of a threat muhuhuhuhuhuhuh)**

**{A0W A/N}: If anyone was wondering, the cover of the story was drawn by Moid, because how awesome is he? Jeezus. And the response has been great so far! Didn't think people would be so open to HomuSaya! Hell, how're we going to get the actual characters to be open to it?! Cuz I don't fucking know, but that's what makes it fun!**


	3. Crysis 3

**[CRYSIS 3]**

**This chapter contains Graphics Content.**

Homura didn't consider herself shy. Not anymore, at least. She had come to realize over time that shyness was a rather useless quality, so she overcame it.

And there was even less reason for her to feel shy about taking a simple shower. That would be stupid. So she stood in front of the full length mirror in the bathroom, naked as the day Sayaka was born, and just stared at her reflection. Or rather, Sayaka's reflection. That was now her reflection. Or something. And she forced herself to not feel shy about it. Or at she tried not to feel shy about it. And failed.

She had to admit, though. The girl was well-toned and athle-_no you don't young lady get back on target. _Homura's face turned a bright pink, and she took a deep breath. A breath that was released quite promptly when there was sudden insistent knocking on the door.

"Homura, you're starting to shower, right? You better not touch anything on me!" The sound of her own voice in Sayaka's bossy and vibrant inflections made Homura's brain want to self destruct.

"It's a shower." Homura deadpanned. "How do you expect me to do that?" Homura secretly hoped Sayaka didn't have a retarded solution to the problem, because she was slightly uncomfortable with the idea herself.

There was a brief silence from the other side of the door. "I dunno! I _did _say that I thought you should let me wash my own body!"

"That would be even _more _uncomfortable, you dolt." Homura sighed, blowing her blue bangs out of her eyes. "You're just going to have to trust me." She could feel and hear Sayaka's sputtering disbelief from the other end of the door.

Homura just sighed, and walked over to the shower. She didn't quite get rid of her blush, though.

[=]

Several minutes later, and Sayaka was in Homura's place in the shower room...except she was still fully-clothed. Unlike Homura, she hadn't quite abandoned the idea of "shyness" as much as Homura supposedly did. She had contemplated equipping herself with a blindfold and some oven mitts, but Homura had looked at her with _that_ face as she thought it.

Homura rapped her fist against the door. "You don't need to keep yourself in there."

"It's not like you have a shower to take!" Sayaka shouted back.

"That doesn't mean you can stay there all night. Take a shower and get done with it."

Sayaka just groaned. "Fine." She finally forced herself to take her shirt off...and noticed instantly just how ungodly _thin _Homura was. She saw the girl's ribcage, and when she turned, she swore that Homura's stomach was about to cave inwards. Her arms and legs were toned by combat, but everything else? Everything else just _screamed _"malnourishment".

"Stop gawking and _take a shower."_

"Do you even eat?!" Sayaka shouted.

"I have better things to do than eat!"

"Too busy stalking to eat?" Sayaka muttered as she rushed out of the rest of the clothes, trying not to notice anything else. "Not even some Crazy-O's for breakfast?"

"Just get in the sh-"

"The shower, yeah, I got it! Doing it!" Sayaka exclaimed huffily as she took the fastest shower of her life and resolved to have Homura's body eat a whole cake later.

[=]

Homura was relieved to have a few minutes to herself. She wasn't used to spending so many hours with one person. Especially with Sayaka of all people. She considered if Kyoko would take Sayaka off her hands? She could keep Sayaka with her at her hotel for the coming weeks and not bother her at all! Kyoko would be happy to do it, considering she had feelings for-

Homura grimaced at her own idea. Yeah, no. Not in her body. That'd become even more complicated and strange for everyone. She wish her mind hadn't gone there.

Wishing to distract herself, Homura pulled out Sayaka's phone that she still had with her. 19 missed calls, 10 voice messages. All from Madoka. The sigh that escaped her lips was melancholy this time as opposed to exasperation. It was just plain sad, really, the amount of concern Madoka displayed for her friends.

How Homura envies them.

The time traveler turned swordswoman peeked at the bathroom door to make sure the shower was still going before taking the liberty to type Madoka a short text. "Sorry to worry you, I'm fine. See you at school tomorrow." One button press, and it was sent. Done was done.

She eventually heard the door open as steam billowed out of the room. Out walked Sayaka, in her body, dressed in just a towel. "Uh...where are your clothes?"

"Your clothes?" Homura muttered flatly. "My clothes are over there." She pointed to a nearby cabinet.

"Okay, then." Sayaka waltzed over and rummaged through it. "You have way too much hair to wash, by the way...Wait. Don't tell me..."

"What?"

"You don't have anything other than uniforms and one suit. Why do you have a suit in the first place?"

"Because it looks nice." Homura said, flatly. "More importantly, what are you looking for?"

"I'm looking for _pajamas!"_

"Sleep in your underwear." Homura went to her bed. "That's what I do."

"Why?!"

"Why not. Is there a problem?"

"Yeah! Does that mean you're going to sleep mostly naked in my body with your purple striped undies?"

Homura freezed for a moment. "I...hold that thought." She grabbed a bra and some panties out of one of her own drawers.

"What are you...oh no. You're not going to-"

"Sports bra. It stretches." Homura walked out of the room. "Give me a minute."

"Don't you-!"

And in just a few seconds, Homura was back in a way-too-tight sports bra and a pair of panties that seemed to be struggling to stay on Sayaka's hips and thighs. Sayaka ogled herself awkwardly before running a hand through her hair.

"Yeah, I definitely need to get clothes from my place." She muttered as she looked away, red faced from embarrassment.

Homura noted how uncomfortable her chest felt and agreed. "Preferably before school starts in the morning."

"Seriously? You want us to go to school like this?" Sayaka looked exhausted just thinking about it.

"I don't care what you do, but I'm going to school. I need to keep an eye on Madoka, and Madoka has been worried about you."

"Ah." Sayaka winced at that. That made some sort of sense. But still, she wanted to let Madoka know she was okay herself, having Homura do it was just... weird and creepy. "Fine, but I have guidelines I want you to follow while you act like me in publi-"

"Goodnight." Homura was already in bed and turning off the lamp, leaving Sayaka in the dark and still naked.

"Hey! Where am I supposed to sleep?"

"The couch."

"You don't have a couch. You have these weird chair things."

"Then sleep on the floor."

"You really don't care about your body, do you?"

"It's survived worse."

Said "worse" things flashed through Sayaka's mind. She shook her head, and walked slowly over to a nearby chair. She sat in it, moved several more of them together, and then tried getting herself to sleep after she pulled on Homura's cursed purple-striped panties. "...You need help."

"Go to sleep."

"Fine."

[=]

"I have retrieved your clothes." Homura announced, holding up a suitcase. Sayaka sighed gratefully at the thought that Homura could now wear proper pajamas to sleep in her body.

"Great! You didn't have any trouble with my mom?"

"Not in particular," Homura started unpacking the clothes. "She did say she packed some protection for you. Ah, here it is." Homura held up a box that Sayaka knocked from her hands before she could get a good look at it.

Her eyes almost bugged out of her skull, and she shook her head. "I'm going to forget that happened!"

[=]

Madoka's walk to school was spent staring at the ground under her feet. She counted the bricks that she walked over like they were the most interesting things in the world, passing by with just a tap. Hitomi wasn't anywhere to be found, and Sayaka was running late.

"Hey!"

Madoka turned with a fake smile on her face. "Sayaka?" So much for her running late. She was actually going to be there on time.

"Hi, Madoka!" Sayaka shouted before she ran over. "How're you?" She grinned. "Doing better now, I hope?"

Madoka looked at her strangely. "I...I am..." She blinked. "Are you okay, Sayaka?"

"Why wouldn't I be?" She said back.

That actually made Madoka cringe. "Sayaka...you're worrying me."

"Well, don't, because I clearly don't deserve your concern," Sayaka rattled off, sounding unusually self-deprecating and the slightest bit bitter. "Considering I'm an idiot who hurts you for petty reasons."

'_You've only been me for two minutes, would you please cool it_?'

Madoka stared at Sayaka. "Sayaka, don't say that about yourself!"

"Why not? I made you cry, I clearly don't give a damn if I die, so-!"

'_Oh, shut up.' _The real Sayaka thought from a few yards away. '_Just apologize to her for me already, will you?'_

"Sayaka..." Homura finally noticed that Madoka had tears in her eyes and immediately felt guilty.

"I'm... sorry, Madoka, I didn't mean to-" Madoka interrupted her with a tight hug, surprising Homura. She stiffened up immediately and internally panicked.

"Sayaka, promise me you'll never do something like that again. Okay?" Homura hesitated before returning the hug, her nerve endings suddenly snapping to life with thrill and elation at the show of affection.

'_Oh for... Seriously? Homura, could you not have those thoughts while just hugging her?'_

'_Could you go away, please?' _Homura put her head on Madoka's shoulder. _'Just let me have this moment.'_

Sayaka just rolled her eyes, before she saw another thought. One of genuine _warmth. _She sighed. _'...Okay.'_

'_Thank you.' _Homura smiled. "I'm sorry, Madoka." She said, quietly. "I'm sorry for being an idiot."

"Don't say that." Madoka's voice was soft. "You're my friend, Sayaka."

Homura felt a jab in her heart, but her hug didn't weaken.

"You're not an idiot. You're my _friend." _

She paused for several seconds. "Yeah, you too." Homura said quietly back. The knowledge that Madoka thought she was speaking to Sayaka was the only thing keeping her from breaking down in tears at this point. It's been too long since Madoka has last hugged her. Possibly a lifetime ago.

'_You're reveling in this, aren't you?'_

Homura let go of Madoka. "I'll see you at the school."

"Aren't you going to walk over with me?" Madoka asked.

Homura shook her head. "I can just meet you at the school. I need some more time to think."

Madoka looked a little sad, but she didn't argue. Instead, she nodded and walked off.

Homura sighed deeply, and watched Madoka walking into the distance. From right behind her, Sayaka patted her on the back. "You've got it bad."

Homura said nothing.

"Like...really bad." She sighed. "And you call _me _smitten."

Homura groaned, and just started walking forwards. "Shut up and get to school."

"Will do." Sayaka smirked. _Man, _it felt good to be one-upping Homura.

"By the way, Kyosuke is right behind you." Homura informed her uncaringly. Sayaka whirled around in a slight panic. By the time she realized Homura had tricked her, the other girl was way ahead of her and Sayaka wanted to bang her head against the nearest tree.

[=]

Sayaka felt oddly nervous when she entered the classroom today. She had the sort of feeling you get when you get a drastically new haircut and awaited the surprised faces of your peers. Except it wasn't a new haircut, it was an entirely new face and body. And she was supposed to keep it a secret.

She almost headed towards her usual seat too, but then stopped short when she saw her own body already in her seat. Homura made eye contact with her, and subtly inclined her head towards her classroom seat since Sayaka didn't seem to remember.

Sayaka set her bag down on the desk and looked over her classmates, feeling weirdly accomplished that her "disguise" was so effective. 'Infiltration successful.' she thought. Across the room Homura rolled her eyes.

She met eyes with Madoka and the pinkette gave her a small hesitant smile and a little wave. Sayaka almost grinned widely at her, but managed a small wave back. With that done, she sat down in her new seat and hoped no one would talk to her.

"H-hi, Homura."

'_Dammit.' _Sayaka turned her head slowly, and right in her face was a shy little girl.

"... Hello." Sayaka responded a bit hesitantly. Her eyes darted to Homura, but it looked like the other girl had started chatting with Madoka, so no help from her. Her eyes went back to the girl, a petite thing with glasses, not from their class. Her face didn't ring any bells within Homura's memory. What could she want with Homura?

"I..." She gulped. "I wanna ask..." The girl was blushing. "I j-just..."

'_She's tripping over her own words...stuttering...oh.' _Sayaka resisted the urge to start sweating in her seat. _'Oh no.'_

"I know th-that you're new...b-but..." Her voice was a light whisper.

"Sorry, I'm not interested." Sayaka said hastily. "I already have someone I like." She said it too quickly, but she somehow managed to keep her voice to a whisper.

'_Smooth.' _Sayaka turned to see Homura still talking to Madoka, as though she just _ignored _the recent outburst.

'_Shut up.' _Sayaka frowned, and turned back to the girl. She already felt a little guilty, but then the expression dropped.

"N-no. I'm not interested in you, either." She pointed. "...I'm interested in...uh..." Her finger was aimed right at a certain pair of pink pigtails. "Her."

'_Oh. Oooooooooooooooooooooh.' _Sayaka looked at Madoka's head, then back at the little girl. "Oh. Well..."

'_Don't you dare.'_

Sayaka had to resist the urge to smirk. "I will let her know, then." She said.

'_I'LL KILL YOU.'_

"Th-thank you." The girl looked so happy that Sayaka felt somewhat guilty for using her to bug Homura.

She flashed the girl an abashed smile. "Yeah, no problem."

'_You're a monster.' _came Homura's sulky response.

'_Pot calling the kettle black.' _Did Sayaka feel guilty? Yes, but it was _worth it._

**[MOID]: Welp, that's chapter triple. YEH. Also, this chapter wasn't very graphic, but now you have visual AIDS. Can you fucking handle it? I'm ready for ascension. **_**TAKE ME UP INTO YOUR KINGDOM OF TORTURE. YES. YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES. **_**But seriously, this was a pretty short chapter. We'll have more content next week. Promise~...maybe. Ish. Probably.**

**[A0W]: Yeh, what he said! Also, thank you for the comments! We love comments!**


	4. Chapter 4

**[CHAPTER 4]**

Homura sat alone on the roof. She took little comfort from the high cathedral-like walls surrounding her, but at least she had a view of the sky and some quiet. It wasn't as hard as she initially thought to be Sayaka. Madoka actually talked to her, how hard could that be? Then again, Sayaka's friend Hitomi had kept shooting worried looks at her, but Homura didn't even want to deal with _that_ issue. Even with Sayaka fuming in her seat the whole class as her mind went over love issues Homura didn't even care about. What a pain. Still, better her angry and focused than losing her mind over depression.

And losing Madoka. But she didn't lose Madoka. The little girl was just a little girl, right? Maybe Madoka wasn't interested. Was she? No, of course not.

'_There's a chance that she doesn't even like girls in this timeline.'_

Homura took a deep breath. "Respect her wishes." She said, quietly. "Protect her and respect her wishes."

Her stomach growled. Homura blinked and looked down at her new body. Funny, her own stomach would usually leave her alone when she was busy contemplating things. Sayaka's seemed to get hungry _while _she was contemplating things. And then she felt a telltale presence at the edge of her perception approaching.

'_Some space away from you would be nice once in a while, don't you think?'_

'_I heard my stomach calling.' _Sayaka replied. _'You can starve your own body, but not mine.' _Sayaka sounded so firm with resolve over such a simple matter that it made the corner of Homura's lips quirk up in amusement.

And with that thought the entrance to the roof opened up and Sayaka came out, walking over with two bags of food. There was a strong gust of wind that swept her long black hair into her face and Sayaka seemed to surprised by that, funnily enough. She shook her head to try to get hair out of her eyes and mouth, but it just made it worse. Homura just watched with some amount of amusement as Sayaka finally made it over to her spot.

"How do you _work _with this hair?" She sputtered. "It's everywhere!"

"Practice." Homura said.

"Yeah? Then practice eating regularly." Sayaka handed Homura one of the bags she had been holding and sat down beside her. "I mean, seriously. I look like a stick figure and I'm not even hungry right now! That's messed up."

Homura watched her dig into her bag of food before reluctantly doing the same. A peek into its contents had her sighing. "I'm not a fan of fried fish."

Sayaka paused with her own fish halfway to her mouth. "Well, I am. So… Maybe since you have my taste buds now you'll like it."

Homura raised a considering brow at her. She might have a point there. "Then that means you won't like it with my taste bu-" Too late, Sayaka spat out the mouthful of fish she had put in her mouth.

"Why?!"

Homura just turned her attentions to her own meal, ignoring Sayaka's dramatic display of retching the food from her mouth. She took a bite of the fish and chewed thoughtfully. "It's good."

Sayaka looked tearfully at the fish that Homura was eating. "_It's not fair_."

Homura looked at the fish. Then she looked at Sayaka. Then she looked back at the fish. She opened her mouth _slowly _and started eating it as _slowly _as possible. Sayaka's purple eyes followed, her tortured soul clearly suffering from not being able to enjoy one of her favorite foods. Homura chewed agonizingly slow and even added a "mm" to her performance, eyes on Sayaka the entire time.

Sayaka looked like she was about to cry. "You're evil."

Homura had to resist the urge to laugh. Sayaka pushed some hair out of her face and sighed deeply. "Okay, fine. So tell me what _do_ you like?"

Homura shrugged. "I'm okay with most things. Avoid seafood."

Sayaka scoffed. "What kind of Japanese person are you?" She fingered her bag and the only other item left in it. "Do you have a favorite snack or something?"

Homura thought the question odd, but didn't see harm in answering. "I like Oreos." Homura replied.

"Oreos, huh?" Sayaka smiled with relief. "Good. I like Oreos too."

"Amazing, something we have in common besides Madoka." Homura deadpanned, finishing off her fried fish.

Sayaka shrugged, and grabbed a pack of Oreos out of the bag. "Eh." She took a bite, and sighed deeply in satisfaction. "Yeah. There is that. At least."

Homura reached for a cookie but was denied by a single well-placed slap of her hand. "What was that?"

"They're my cookies." Sayaka said with a smirk. "And you're not gonna ruin _my _body. I mean, I'll eat for you, sure, but that's because you _need _the food."

"What are you even talking about?" Homura said, flatly. "Even if it was that important, we're still going to be fighting witches. That's a workout."

"Well, then it's because I don't want to give you any." Sayaka had an uncharacteristically evil smirk.

"This is payback for the fish, isn't it?" Homura stared at her. "Then if that's the case…"

"Hey, what are you doing?"

"Nothing." She snatched Sayaka's fish up. "Just enjoying food you hate." She opened her mouth. "And…"

"Oh, come _on!"_

They were both so occupied with torturing each other with food that they both failed to notice the shuffling of shoes near them.

"Homura? Sayaka?" Madoka looked rather surprised to see them both together. And not trying to strangle each other. Figuratively, in Madoka's head.

Sayaka's back had stiffened at her voice, giving Homura a brief wide-eyed look of panic. Homura nudged her to try to act natural. Sayaka tried to arrange her face in a way that would suggest that she was really Homura and that she was completely apathetic to everything that existed.

"What are you two doing here? Could it be that…" Madoka have a little hopeful gasp. "You two have decided to work together?"

"Not quite." Sayaka tried to make her best Homura impression. "I mean, she is stealing all of the food."

"I'm not." Homura, likewise, tried her best to do a Sayaka impression. "I mean, heck, it's...uh…not like I like your food! Weirdo!" Homura internally cringed at her own performance.

'_Smooth.'_

'_Shut up!'_

Madoka wasn't deterred. "You are!" She smiled, and Homura felt her heart flutter. "That makes me feel so much better!" She put a hand to her chest and breathed a very literal sigh of relief. She moved to sit between the two of them and they both had to move over a little, not having realized they had been sitting so close together.

Madoka had a really nice bento filled to the brim with appetizing food, which Sayaka regarded enviously. "Not that I don't think you can handle yourself, Sayaka, but I really believe having Homura with you is a good thing!" Madoka very nearly caught Sayaka's eye roll when she flashed her a smile.

"I do have a lot to learn. Since I'm… Sayaka." Homura ended up saying rather awkwardly once more and she wondered why she even bothered trying to act like the most punchable person on the planet.

"And I need to learn to socialize and communicate." Sayaka chimed in, keeping her face as stoic as possible.

Homura glared. "And I need to get better with my grades."

"And I need to stop acting uppity and condescending."

Homura's right eye twitched. "And I need to be less selfish."

"And I need to be less of a hypocrite."

"And _I-!" _Homura looked a little angier, before Madoka put a hand to their chests.

"Stop! Please!" She sighed. "Just...stop it." For a second, Homura looked worried.

'_Maybe she figured out something was wrong?'_

"You're both good people. Stop doing this to yourselves!"

'_Oh.'_

"Is this some sort of game you two are playing? Because that's not a very fun game."

"Something like that…" Homura forced a small smile.

"Well, don't play it anymore." Madoka said sternly. Too much bad has happened lately for them to be forcing negativity onto themselves. Why didn't they see that? "Why don't you try saying something nice about yourselves instead?" Madoka suggested. She was surprised by the blank looks she got from both magical girls. "What?"

She was met with contemplative silence for several moments. Homura seemed to sweating as she stared ahead intensely. Sayaka put her chin in her hands as she seemed to put serious thought into finding something nice to say about herself.

"I'm not..._too _much of an idiot?" Homura said.

Madoka sighed. "That's a step in the right direction, at least."

"I'm determined." Sayaka said, before she specifically glared at Homura a little.

"I don't back down." Homura said. _'Even if it would be smarter to do so.'_

"Good!" Madoka smiled, and it was at this moment that both of them were happy that Madoka couldn't hear their thoughts. "I mean…" She twisted her skirt a little. "I don't want you two to hate yourselves. You shouldn't."

Both Sayaka and Homura immediately felt guilty. That seemed to be Madoka's special skill.

"Oh, Oreos!" Madoka helped herself happily to a cookie.

And immediately, two thoughts started at exactly the same moment. _'Cute.' _Homura and Sayaka blinked at that, and stared right at each other for a second. Homura looked away, and Sayaka stared at the floor confusedly.

Sayaka blushed a little. _'Your thoughts are corrupting me.'_

'_That never happened.'_

'_Agreed.'_

The group ate in silence for a few moments until Sayaka spoke up seemingly out of the blue. "By the way, Madoka, some girl apparently has a crush on you."

'_HOW DARE YOU.' _

Madoka blushed. "Wh-what?"

"She asked me if it was okay to introduce you to her." Sayaka smiled. "I'm certain that she would like to meet you."

Madoka fidgeted. "I...I don't know, Homura."

The actual Homura was fuming and sending mental daggers at Sayaka over Madoka's head.

'_If looks could kill- ow. Owowowow!' _Sayaka winced at the mental daggers as she tried to focus on what Madoka was saying.

"Who could it be?" Madoka asked curiously.

"Uh," Sayaka tried to fend off the stare she could feel burning a hole in her skull. "I actually don't know, I didn't get her name."

Madoka was intrigued, but still oddly confused. She had been under the impression that maybe Homura was interested in her beyond warning her away from the world of magical girls, but it seemed that wasn't the case now if she was offering to set her up with some other girl. She felt vaguely bothered by that but the feeling disappeared quickly.

"I guess I could meet her?" Madoka said hesitantly, still not sure how to feel about this news. Then she squeaked in surprise when she felt an arm circle her shoulders.

"Madoka is my wife." Homura declared, blushing brightly even as she had tried and failed to go for a light joking tone. The group collectively fell into an awkward pause as Homura kept her tight hold around the small girl.

"But _Sayaka," _Sayaka tried to not to sound as exasperated as she usually did, since it would be weird coming from Homura's mouth.

"Mine." Madoka's face was red at this point from the attention.

"But-"

"Mine." Homura glared at Sayaka, and the other girl resisted the urge to groan from annoyance.

'_Taking advantage pretty hard, aren't you?' _

'_Yes.' _ Homura confirmed. Sayaka sighed and she stood up, dusting her hands free of Oreo crumbs. Funny, she could've sworn she had more cookies than that.

"Well, I'm going to go…" Sayaka tried to think of something Homura would do in her spare time. "... Comb my hair." She finished lamely, walking away and trying to assume her most mysterious atmosphere. And failing. "Oh, and don't become a magical girl either!" She shouted over her shoulder as an afterthought. She left feeling like she could totally project Homura now.

Homura internally grinned. _'Success.'_

"Sayaka?" Madoka looked at her. "Do you...uh…"

Homura blushed. "Hm?"

"Nevermind." She stood up and walked away quickly. Homura couldn't see her expression as she left; just the bobbing of two little pigtails.

Alone again with her quiet, Homura reached into her sleeves and pulled out some Oreos she had snatched from Sayaka while the other girl wasn't looking. Sayaka's hands were pretty darn fast.

[=]

The rest of the day was uneventful at best, even as Homura readily took advantage of her new position in Sayaka's body to talk to Madoka. Eventually, they both walked home, and Homura was wearing a big smile on her face. Sayaka on the other hand appeared frazzled.

"So… you did okay as me?" Sayaka eventually asked to fill in the lengthy silence.

"Easily," Homura responded. "I even took the liberty of doing very poorly on today's pop quiz for you."

Sayaka's eyebrows shot up at that. "Yeah, well… So did I!" Sayaka claimed, looking off to the side.

"I know you did." Homura smirked. "Even if you did try your best on that quiz."

"Geh." Sayaka's eye twitched and she rubbed her cheek to cover up her embarrassed flush. "Whatever!" Eventually her eyes slid back over to Homura with a fearfully curious look.

"Did… Hitomi talk to you at all?" Homura shook her head. Sayaka briefly chewed her lower lip while frowning. "Figures."

"If it's any consolation…" Homura instinctively tried flipping her hair back, only to realize that she didn't have any hair to flip. _'There goes one habit'. _"They did try. But I figured that you'd pass up the opportunity."

Sayaka opened her mouth to protest, then she stopped and sighed. "I would, wouldn't I?"

"Yes. You would have." Homura stared at her. "Honestly? At this point, you normally would have turned into a witch."

"I know." Sayaka muttered. "I saw those memories." She put her hands behind her head. "Man, this is all so complicated."

"There is one thing I know." Homura adjusted Sayaka's hairclips. "We _really _need to get used to each others' powers."

"Agreed." Sayaka said flatly. "Actually, that's a question. Where the heck can we even try these out?"

"I know a place." Homura smiled. "It's secluded, it's quiet, and nobody ever goes there."

"Like a makeout point?" Sayaka asked in earnest, before her face turned red. "I...oh. _Oh."_

"Yes, I did that once." Homura smiled. "But only once." Again, it's genuine. "But that one...that was the one…"

Sayaka saw an image of Homura shooting Madoka's soul gem. "Why did…" Realization dawned in her eyes. "She asked you."

"She couldn't bear the thought of hurting people." Homura said. She took a deep breath. "Let's...just...let's keep going." She walked on ahead, Sayaka looking after her with a slightly worried expression before following her.

Eventually, they reached it. It was a dirty, dingy place, right under a highway's bridge. The sound of passing cars and honking horns interrupted the dead silence, but not enough to be completely distracting. There were cans and trash scattered around the place, and the place smelled of rot and decay. "Jeez." Sayaka held her nose. "This place _reeks. _Can't believe you did _that_ here with Madoka. You romantic."

Homura pointedly ignored that remark. "Welcome to Mitakihara's garbage dump." Homura said. "It's not officially called that. Officially, it's the 'ocean'."

"Enough of the snark." Sayaka took a deep breath. "How do you live with this crap?!"

"You already know the answer to that." Homura said. "Now...first thing's first. Can you stop time?"

"I...maybe?" She tapped the shield. "Uh...it's not working."

Homura groaned. "No, you don't just tap it! You have to…" She held it. "_Turn _it." And suddenly, the world around them stopped. A piece of paper that was fluttering in the wind froze.

Sayaka's jaw dropped. "Whoa."

"It's useful." Homura says. "Now...you turn the shield. Don't use it for too long, or else you run the risk of getting your soul gem corrupted." She twisted the shield again, and suddenly, time started up once more. "I tested it out here."

Sayaka saw the memory. "On a poor, defenseless barrel, right?"

Homura just smirked. "Yes." She brought over one. "Now...I just need you to destroy this without me seeing you move from that spot."

"...Really?" Sayaka grinned. "That'll be easy!" A split second later...and the barrel was tipped over onto its side, and a panting, exhausted-looking Sayaka was staring at it. A myriad of weapons were spread around her feet, including a stapler, a nailgun, a pogo stick, and a crowbar. "...Nevermind."

"I forgot to tell you how _that _particular thing worked." Homura muttered. "Okay, so in order to work with my weaponry, you have to know how to access my arsenal first."

"No duh?" Sayaka glared at her. "Why didn't you think to tell me this?"

"Because I hate you."

Sayaka just sighed. "At least you're honest." She stood up straight. "So how _do _I access the weapons that I actually want to use?"

"Memorizing the location of each and every single one meticulously."

Sayaka frowned. "...Seriously?"

"Thankfully, you have my memories to pull that from."

Sayaka sighed, and immediately thought of Homura's weaponry. She smiled. "Okay, I have it." She reached in...and pulled out a LMG. She blew apart the barrel with a torrent of bullets, before she threw away the expended ammo box and shoved in a new one. "Done!"

"Good." Homura said, before she wordlessly stalked over and grabbed the box. "...Now you just have to learn how _not to waste ammunition."_

[=]

Homura took a deep breath. "So...how can I train your powers?"

"Slice a barrel."

"You already blew it up with a grenade." Homura said. "What, are you going to magically make a new one? I can't quite do that."

"Then slice _something!" _Sayaka groaned. "There really isn't much to say, other than that I can easily cleave things in half and take a lot of hits!"

Homura rolled her eyes and grabbed a tire that just happened to by lying on the ground nearby. She threw it into the air, and promptly _sliced _it into fourths, then fifths and eighths. Eventually, what remained were a bunch of tire _shreddings, _and Homura didn't even seem all too winded.

"Done." She said.

"That's not the only thing I can do." Sayaka stood up and walked to her. "Try mak-"

Homura leaped into the air, and promptly tried to make a platform out of musical notes to leap off of...only for the music to come out _flawed. _The platform was uneven, and she promptly kicked it out of existence the moment she tried to leap off of it. She wound up hitting the ground face-first in a cloud of dust. "...Ow." She muttered.

Sayaka, on the other hand, didn't know whether or not she should cringe or laugh. "Okay, so you messed that up."

Homura said something into the ground.

"What was that?"

"Fuck off."

Sayaka almost died of laughter.

[=]

"Okay, so what you need to do is to tap into my mind, right?" Sayaka said. The sun was a bit lower in the sky by this point, and the world around them was starting to turn orange.

"How did you even make the platforms properly?" Homura asked. "It's bizarre; I can't do it for some reason."

"Well…" Sayaka just shrugged. "I dunno."

Homura just glared at her. "You don't know." She repeated, flatly. "How don't you know? You're the one doing it! You not knowing how to do what you already can do makes no _sense."_

"Yeah, well, you can stop time! And _that _doesn't make sense either!"

"Yes, it does." Homura said. "I made a wish and it warps space and time."

"Well, that doesn't make any sense! It's like saying 'it works because it's magic'."

"I don't have to explain it."

"Then I don't have to explain my powers!"

"Apparently you can't since you don't even know how it works." Homura nearly growled. She saw Sayaka work her jaw in annoyance before running a frustrated hand down her face.

"How about… Sometimes I think about… music?" Sayaka muttered. "Maybe that would work."

"How do you mean?" Homura asked curiously. Sayaka crossed her arms.

"Well, I have a thing for music, so I figure that explains the musical notes."

"Go on." Homura prompted, forcing Sayaka to think some more. It must've been very hard for her.

"So," Sayaka did a very ungraceful hair flip, and promptly got her fingers caught in her hair. "Try thinking…" She struggled a bit to get some of the hair out. "...of some good _music _while you do it…" Eventually, her fingers were free of hair. "...or something!" She finally suggested.

Homura raised a skeptical brow. "What, like good grindcore?" She asked seriously.

Sayaka just stared at her. "Good...grindcore?" She blinked a few times. "Aren't those mutually exclusive?"

"We're mutually exclusive, your point?" Homura didn't appreciate Sayaka's disrespectful attitude regarding her favorite type of music. The sounds of head-baging madness had been one of the only things that made her stay sane during her hospital stay.

Sayaka shook her head, still trying to wrap her head around "good grindcore". "Look, just… Listen." Sayaka closed her eyes and thought of the song Ave Maria. She let the music swell and engulf her head and thoughts, transmitting the beautiful sounds to Homura's mind.

"What I wouldn't give for some _Cattle Decapitation _right about now."

"Wait, is that a real band or are you just…" Sayaka shook her head quickly. "Oh, just do _something, _Homura!"

Homura took a deep breath, and leaped into the air...before she promptly blew a hole in the overpass with the sound of screaming guitars and lyricists. And her skull. Where she was just a moment ago, there was now a series of floating notes and waves, before they quickly expanded and vanished.

Sayaka stared at it for several long seconds. "Didn't see that coming."

And then an unconscious Homura fell through the hole, face-first, and smashed into the ground with a cloud of dust.

[=]

They were right back at Homura's apartment, when Sayaka just dumped her on the bed. She rolled a little, winding up right-side-up on the bed.

Sayaka panted, and wiped sweat off of her brow. "Don't do that again." She said. "We almost got caught!" She sat down on the bed to catch her breath, wondering if her body was always that heavy.

Homura just groaned a little and Sayaka titled her head attentively at that.

"What, are you awake now?" Sayaka asked.

Homura didn't move.

"...I'll take that as a no." She sighed as she watched the other girl a little enviously. She was starting to feel exhausted herself. Trying to sleep in Homura's stiff and stressed body while trying to be comfortable on chairs was a feat in and of itself. "Well." She stood up. "I guess that's my cue to-"

'_Nobody.'_

Sayaka froze as she caught the whisper out of the corner of her mind. "...Hm?"

'_I can't.'_

Sayaka listened harder, focusing on the whisper. The voice she heard was tiny and fragile. A shadow of the assured voice she was accustomed to hearing. "What the heck?" Her eyes trailed over to Homura's unconscious face. She looked pale and was grimacing slightly. Her body was twisting and tightening with distress and didn't look relaxed at all.

'_I can't do it.' _Homura's voice whimpered. _'Please...please!' _Sayaka instinctively followed the voice, closing her eyes and listening. And as she did a new world opened up to her and she stepped into this new level of perception. In her mind, Sayaka could see a familiar young girl in the center of it all. She's still petite. She was still tiny...and unlike Homura, she was wearing red-rimmed glasses. The girl is kneeling in the middle of a busy and crowded street that seemed to not only ignore her existence, but avoided her at all costs.

Sayaka found herself standing on the street corner, seemingly the only person who noticed the huddling miserable figure. '..._Homura?' _Sayaka called out hesitantly. She knew she was intruding on something very personal beyond mere memory now. But she could not ignore something like this.

'_Who's there?!' _The girl looked around as Sayaka's voice reached her through her self-imposed bubble. _'What do you want?!'_

'_Are you okay?!' _Sayaka pushed through the crowd and finally, she reached the girl and knelt in front of her.

It was Homura, just as she was before...well...everything. _'...Go away!'_

Sayaka recoiled a little. _'...Is this the real you?'_

'_I told you to leave!' _Homura shouted. _'I...I don't need you to help! Nobody can help!' _She started to sob. _'I…!'_

Sayaka hated that helpless feeling of watching girls cry. Luckily she was experienced with crying girls, being childhood friends with Madoka. _'Come on.' _She pulled the resisting little girl into a hug.

'_G-Get away f-from...' _Her protests were drowned out by sobs.

'_There...' _Sayaka held Homura tightly despite the hug being one-sided. _'Now...what couldn't you do?'_

'_...Save her.' _Homura wiped her eyes. _'...Never.' _Her glasses fell off as soon as she did that and they cracked when they hit the pavement.

Sayaka stared at the glasses on the ground as negative feelings helplessly welled up inside her. _'Well...you do have help. At least, this time you do.' _She smiled softly. _'I can help.'_

'_How?!' _Homura grit her teeth and let out another choked sob. _'A-All you do is die! Over and over! It hurts her!' _She's an absolute mess. _'And I...I can't save any of you! I fail all of you!'_

Sayaka winced a little at that. Homura sounded so torn up, so raw, and so _sorry _it cut Sayaka straight through the chest. _'...Jeez.' _She just sighed a little shakily. _'I guess I was right. You really did need a hug.' _She quietly holds Homura, thinking that she needed this hug too. _'Just relax, okay? We'll get through this.'_

'_No we won't.' _Homura sounded so tired just from that one statement. Like there was hardly any fight left.

'_Fooey.' _Sayaka smiled. _'I know that you know that I'm gonna help you. And there's nothing you can do about it.' _

Homura didn't say anything else, and just let Sayaka hug her. It was strange to be hugging someone's mental image, especially given how terribly they treated each other. But at least it helped, even if just a little bit.

**[MOID A/N]: I enjoy Soylent Green.**

**[a0w A/N]: I like grapes.**


	5. Chapter 5

**[Chapter 5]**

Homura awoke with a jolt. Her blue eyes snapped open and she briefly panicked as she had the overwhelming feeling of waking up in a place you didn't recognize. Except she recognized the place just fine, it was the body she was in that felt unfamiliar and her hand flew to her chest instinctively. Sayaka's heartbeat was so strong it surprised Homura. She was used to her own weak heart, so feeling that steady pulse thrumming in her chest like a powerful revving engine caught her off guard. But it was also strangely comforting.

She took deep breaths, calming her new horse-powered heart as she settled down. She looked around and saw, on the floor, was her old body. Sayaka decided to sleep near the bed this time, with a pillow and a blanket. Perhaps the floor was more comfortable than the chairs.

Homura sighed. What a foolish girl she was...then she remembered something else. Sayaka had _cared _last night. She smiled thinly at that, before she made it evaporate quickly. She couldn't be bogged down in that _now. _

"Kyou...tomi...super…"

Homura blinked in surprise and peered curiously at the sleeping form facing away from her.

"I...am a fly...over cow."

Homura just rolled her eyes and fell back onto the bed. She briefly entertained the thought of repaying what Sayaka had done last night by peeking into her dreamscape to see what the heck went on in that brain of hers. But she didn't really want to know. And the last thing she needed was some kind of repeat of what Sayaka had done. Perhaps it would just be better to ignore all of this and pretend it didn't happen.

"I know you're awake." Sayaka intentionally interrupted her thoughts, making Homura freeze up. "Your… brain was really loud when you woke up."

Homura forced herself to relax. "So you were knew that you were spouting nonsense?"

"Yup." Sayaka kept staring at the wall while Homura stared up at the ceiling. Something of an awkward atmosphere descended between the two, since the last time they had interacted it had been on a very… intimate level. Homura briefly took measure of what was going through Sayaka's mind at the moment. The other girl had been listening in on her thoughts, and she did not want to ignore what had happened between them. Homura resisted the urge to groan when she felt Sayaka was actually about to talk about it.

"We really need to stop treating each other horribly." Was what Sayaka chose to say. She even managed to sound serious when she said it. Homura blinked at that, figuring that Sayaka would have gone with the "You suck at hugs" line that had been floating around in her head.

"Yes," Homura started tentatively. "But our personalities simply won't allow that."

"That's baloney." Sayaka smiled. "We _can _get along_."_

"No. We _can't." _Homura said, coldly.

"Yes."

"_No." _

Sayaka felt a flash of heat go up her neck and she grit her teeth in frustration. She could feel Homura reinforcing that wall between them, and it infuriated Sayaka to no end. It was clear to her that it wasn't that Homura believed they couldn't get along; it was that she _refused_ to. If Sayaka wanted to get anywhere with her, she had to be more than just talk. She had to take action herself.

"Then I'll do the honors first." Sayaka turned over, purple eyes determined. "From this moment on, I'll stop treating you terribly, and you can stop acting all high-and-mighty. Yes, you've gone through things that I can not even _begin _to imagine," Sayaka closed her eyes briefly as she braved to touch upon an untouchable subject. "But you know what? That doesn't give you the right to act like a stone cold b-b-_bitch." _Sayaka breathed harshly when she finally got that word off her chest. "...Wow. I actually said that word."

"Congratulations," Homura said flatly. "You said a bad word."

"Okay, that's what I was talking about." Sayaka raised a hand. "Stop being a sarcastic know-it-all and _listen_, for once."

"Stop trying to white knight your way through this." Homura sounded far away, like she was so tired she couldn't be bothered to take Sayaka seriously. "I'm stuck with you. You're nothing but another burden on my list."

Sayaka sat up, feeling that heat shoot up her spine again except much hotter this time, and Homura's heart was beating away roughly in her chest. Her mouth was set to say any number of things to lash out at this girl who consistently treated her like nothing but a lit fuse.

But she was right too, wasn't she? Sayaka's clenched jaw relaxed somewhat as she stared at Homura's calm face that stared unblinkingly up at the ceiling. Sayaka took a deep shuddering breath, forcing back her comments and knee-jerk negative responses. She just promised that she wouldn't treat Homura terribly anymore. Even if Homura insisted on acting like a jerk, Sayaka had to try to keep her word anyway.

"I don't think I've thanked you yet." Sayaka said quietly. That piqued Homura's interest and she glanced at the other girl.

"For what?"

"For… looking out for Madoka for so long." Sayaka gave Homura a small grateful smile when their eyes met. "So thank you. I owe you one."

Homura held the gaze as her mind took its time reacting to those words. She rolled them over in her head slowly. No one had ever thanked her before. Certainly not for everything's she's gone through. But she could see and feel the sincerity with which Sayaka spoke those words.

"You owe me more than one." Homura meant to say that with her usual uncaring tone, but was surprised to hear the quality of her voice come out shaky, as if she she couldn't quite keep herself together. She could feel Sayaka hesitantly prod her mind, trying to decipher what it was she was feeling, but Homura herself didn't know exactly what she was feeling.

"I know," Sayaka agreed, smiling. "Which is why I'm going to help you and play nice whether you like it or not, like I said before. Deal with it."

Homura just looked at her, mentally swallowing those words. If Sayaka had blinked, she would have missed the single nod Homura gave her. Her smile grew as she felt Homura accept her terms.

"Great!" She stood up, and Homura noticed with some chagrin that her hair was extremely unkempt. Homura had taken a certain amount of pride in her long black hair and had taken good care of it. Seeing it on Sayaka and how messy it seemed to be progressively getting was making Homura develop a headache. More so than the one she constantly had. She wondered if she could comb it for Sayaka if the other girl was so incapable.

"...And if you _really _need it, you can comb my hair. Your hair. This hair."

"I'm hoping that won't be necessary," Homura got out of bed. "You want me to trust you, so let's start with something small. From now on, I'm entrusting you to take _proper _care of my hair." Homura smirked at a baffled Sayaka. "I suggest you get to it."

The other girl's eyes glowered at Homura even as her lips pouted slightly in acceptance. "Fine."

"Great." Homura mimicked Sayaka's words from earlier using a much flatter tone as she walked past Sayaka. She left the bedroom and headed straight for the main white room with the pendulum.

She called it her strategy room, but Kyouko and Sayaka idiotically referred to it as the Batcave. Homura did not quite understand why. If they had to compare it to something, the Fortress of Solitude made much more sense.

Speaking of Kyouko…

"Yo!" Homura stared at the redhead casually lounging on one of the chairs with a bowl of cereal in her hand. "Just letting you know, you have next to nothing in your fridge."

"You broke in." Homura stated.

"I'm visiting." She said back. "I didn't _break in."_

"Then why does my window have a hole in it?"

Kyouko looked up and, indeed, there was a gaping hole in one of the windows. "...Because a bird hit it. Hard."

"Where's the bird?" Homura asked, flatly.

Kyouko raised an arm and, indeed, there was a dead pigeon in her hand. "This bird."

Homura stared at it, then at Kyouko. "...Why the hell-?"

"I threw it, and it _accidentally _hit your window."

"How does it _accidentally _hit my window?!" Homura looked even _more _annoyed.

"It did a nice roll." Kyouko sat up. "Why the fuck would I lie about that? I mean, come _on." _Kyouko clicked her tongue. "So… do you think this stuff is edible, or..?" Homura snatched the dead bird from her hand and threw it out the window with all of her strength, loudly shattering the rest of the glass plane. "You were just _complaining _about that! Come on!"

"That's disgusting, Kyouko. I'd rather have a damaged window than having you eat a dead bird inside of my house."

"...So what, you hate chicken and turkey, then?"

Homura groaned loudly. "Why are you here?"

Kyouko simply shrugged. "Checking up on you two. Watching the both of you train yesterday was one of the most hilarious things I've ever seen. Like, of all time."

Homura rolled her eyes. "Why would you check up on us?"

"Simple." Kyouko said. "Can't have you killing each other. I mean, there is that _Walpurgis _thing you told me about." She laid down on the couch. "You're about as stable as kerosene by a bonfire."

"So I've heard." Homura's eye twitched.

"I might just shadow you two. You know, keep you from going completely fucking nuts." She froze. "Well, I might be a little late with that one."

Sayaka chose that moment to enter the room. "Oh, it's Kyouko. When did you…" Her eyes found the window. "You broke in."

Kyouko burst out laughing. "It's like you two have become one person!" Both Homura and Sayaka glared at her. Homura shook her head and turned to Sayaka, quirking a brow at her. Sayaka had tied her hair up in a ponytail.

"What? I combed it, relax!" Sayaka touched her hair self-consciously.

"It's better than it was earlier, at least." Homura muttered.

"I like it." Kyouko chimed in.

Homura said "No one asked for your opinion," at the same time Sayaka replied with "Who asked you?" Kyouko just looked between them smugly, clearly expressing that the body-switched girls were pure entertainment for her.

Sayaka quickly gleaned the other two's conversation from Homura's mind as she went to sit down across from the redhead. Doing the mind thing was getting progressively easier. "You said there was nothing in the fridge, Kyouko?"

"Hm? Oh yeah. I ate the last of the cereal." Kyouko held up her empty bowl. Sayaka sighed and looked at Homura.

"We should really go shopping to stock you up with food."

"No need." Homura said, annoyed at this insistence.

"Yes, there _is_." Sayaka said. "We're not having this conversation again. I'm going to knock you up with a food baby if it's the last thing I do."

"I think that's the best thing you've ever said, Sayaka." Kyouko said with a huge grin in Homura's direction. Homura resisted the urge to groan. It was too early in the morning for two idiots at once.

"Now that we're all here," Homura grabbed the other two's attention with her tone. "I might as well go over my revised plans for Walpurgisnacht."

"I can read your thoughts." Sayaka said. "There isn't much explaining for you to do other than the stuff that you've already told me unintentionally."

"Since I doubt you understand most of it, I'll explain anyway." Sayaka was about to open her mouth when Homura interrupted. "Yes, I am being condescending. No, you don't need to acknowledge it."

Sayaka grumbled and crossed her arms. She was being true to form and doing her best to be nice. Homura hesitated to feel impressed by the effort, since she knew Sayaka would pick up on that thought. It almost made her feel bad that she wasn't treating her with the same courtesy. Almost.

"Sayaka and I are more or less stuck. We've come to an agreement to live with it." She glared at Sayaka just before she opened her mouth again to properly discuss some plans.

Then Kyouko interrupted her. "You two fuck. It'll be glorious. Your children will defeat the Witch. All thirty of them. All the food babies. Best plan 2013."

At that moment, Homura really wished that Sayaka had laser eyes. That way, she could vaporize Kyouko. And then bring her back to life. Then kill her. Then bring her back to smash her soul gem with a shark's tooth while the shark was still alive. Sayaka provided the mental imagery of a giant purple shark doing the job, which mildly amused Homura.

"First off, no. Secondly…" Sayaka pointed at Homura. "We hate each other. Thirdly, _no._"

"I was joking, hotshot." Kyouko pulled out a crushed bag of chips from her jacket pocket, ripping it open. "You two need to lighten up. It's too grimdark in here."

"That's not even a word."

"Yes it is." Kyouko rolled her eyes. "So what's the plan?"

Homura eyed the redhead for a moment, making sure the other girl was going to be serious and professional from now on. Probably too much to hope for, but she seemed like she was going to listen quietly for the moment. "Sayaka and I are probably stuck in these bodies indefinitely." They shared a meaningful look. "And we can read each others' minds."

"I know." Kyouko said. "Sayaka was complaining about seeing your fanta-"

"A-_hem." _Sayaka glared at her.

Kyouko sighed and waved a hand. "Carry on."

"We need to be alive in order to fight Walpurgis. Simple as that." Homura crossed her arms. "Every single one of us. For me and Sayaka, that means figuring out how to use our powers as soon as possible."

"Kinda like what happened at the bridge? Please tell me there'll be more of that."

Both of them glared at Kyouko. She was starting to grate on their collective nerves. Sayaka projected the mental image of Kyouko getting hit by a plane, and it almost made Homura smile.

"What are you two thinking?"

"About you getting hit with a plane." Sayaka says. "Heck, I can draw it for you." In a flash, she grabbed a pencil, a paper, and started sketching as Homura continued.

"In order to do that, we need combat experience. We could achieve this in Witch's barriers, but that'll likely get us killed. So instead of doing that and being counterproductive, we could first try out our new powers on Kyouko here." Homura gestured at the redhead, smirking slightly at the prospect of beating the other girl for all the stupid things that have come out of her mouth.

"Your drawing sucks." Unfortunately, the one she wanted to beat up didn't seem to be listening to her. Sayaka's drawing looked like a dinky sticky figure about to be violated by a cucumber with wings.

"It's Homura's body's fault." Sayaka muttered, brow furrowed in obvious displeasure that her drawing came out so bad.

"No, you just suck."

Sayaka just stuck her tongue out at her.

Homura sighed and continued. "We just need to find a good sparring location, and then we can meet there regularly. Daily would be preferable." She almost grinned like an idiot at the prospect of beating the shit out of Kyouko. _Daily. _Sayaka seemed to share her eagerness.

Kyouko shrugged indifferently. " You mean I can beat the tar out of two magical girls who are pretty much novices with their powers? Fuckin' A." She leans back. "Seems like a good plan to me."

"Obviously not out to help us." Sayaka growled.

"Nope! I'd rather get skewered by a lamppost than help you guys out. I'm just doing this to beat the shit out of a selfish bitch and an i-idiot." She stuttered on the last word. "Either way, it'll be fun to do."

"Not as much fun as we'll be having." Sayaka gave the girl an eager grin. "Right, Homura?" She turned to Homura with the same excited face.

Homura blinked at her. "... Right." It was weird to see Sayaka so ready and willing to team up with her, let alone be enthusiastic about it. Also, Homura had never noticed this about her own face, but… She had a pretty decent lady-killing smile. Seriously, she stared for a moment. It was weird. Sayaka's smile widened at those thoughts, and Homura quickly stopped thinking altogether. It was an easy thing to do now that she had Sayaka's brain.

"Hey!"

"So when do you guys feel like getting your asses kicked?" Kyouko asked before she started pouring the contents of her bag of chips down her throat and throwing the bag away. "Because I'm here to kick ass and eat food. And I'm all out of fo- no, wait," Kyouko stuck her hands in her pockets and recovered an old candy bar. "Forgot that was there."

Sayaka growled, her last ounce of patience used up. "Right now!" She exclaimed. "Well, no! I mean, yes right now, but _your_ butt is the one getting kicked!"

Homura could only heave a tired sigh.

[=]

"Okay, let's set up some ground rules." Homura shouted from the middle of a forest. It was a small thing on the outskirts of Mitakihara; probably a leftover from a time before urban expansion took the rest of the island. "One...no stabbing or slicing. I will be following that rule myself."

"How about sho-"

"No shooting, either."

"So basically," Kyouko's aggravated voice shouted from some other location. "No _fun_ allowed in this little fight? Should I just use my fists?"

"Just don't kill people, genius!" Sayaka shouted from somewhere else. "I know that must be a foreign concept for you!"

"Shut up or I'll kil-... _maim _you!" Kyouko stumbled over her threat. "Just come at me, the both of you! I'll be Rambo in this little exercise."

"How is this anything like Rambo?" Sayaka questioned incredulously. "If anything I'm Rambo, 'cause I have guns!"

"They're Homurambo's guns that you stole for the Homucave!" Kyouko was cracking up.

Homura's eye twitched. "Let's just _practice, _okay? Is it _that difficult _for you to practice without _killing each other?" _Homura heard a '_Yes_' from Sayaka's mind about to leave her lips, but Homura sent out a pulse of feeling that immediately silenced Sayaka. It was a simple feeling that promised bad things if Sayaka didn't shut up.

"Fine." They said.

Eventually, all three of them are on the field. Homura is standing on the sidelines in Sayaka's magical girl form, and Sayaka herself is getting ready to fight.

"...You ready?" Kyouko smirked as she whipped out a spear, twirling it in her hands.

"Heck yeah!" Sayaka pulled out a shotgun. "Try me!"

Homura, on her own end, quietly pulled out two swords. "Naturally."

And like that, the fight began.

[=]

Madoka was aghast by what she was hearing. "What do you mean you're not sure where she is?" She asked into the apartment intercom. Sayaka's mother's voice responded back.

"Like I said, she came by a couple of days ago and picked up some clothes with a really weird excuse. I figured she met a boy or something. I'm sure she's fine!"

"... We're in _middle school._" Madoka didn't know why she was so bewildered; Sayaka's mom had this weird tendency for trusting the television to raise her kid, then believing she'll be fine out in the real world.

"Well, I trust her. Try her phone, I'm sure you'll find her just fine. And when you do, let her know that I have more protection if she needs it!"

"Oh… okay." Madoka had no idea what the woman meant by that. "Sayaka could always use protection."

"Would you like some as well, Madoka?"

The pinkette canted her head at the question. When she thought of protection, her mind went to Homura and Sayaka protecting the city together now. "No thank you, I have plenty of protection myself."

"Atta girl."

[=]

Homura blocked a strike from Kyouko, before she was quickly hook kicked in the face. She was sent barreling across the ground with a spray of blood before she tossed a sword forwards. Without so much as a flinch, Kyouko blocked it with one swipe of her polearm, before she spun around and knocked a pistol out of Sayaka's hand.

"Oh, come on!" She shouted, before she was smashed into the ground by the flat of Kyouko's blade.

"This is too fuckin' easy!" Kyouko grinned. "Two against one? That's unfair! _For you!"_

"Funny." Homura grit her teeth. "So _cocky _all of a sudden."

"News flash: I've always been cocky!" She brought the blade down, but was immediately blocked by a shield. Her confidence was quickly replaced by annoyance. "...Really?"

"Yes. Really." Sayaka smirked, before Homura leaped up and did a flip over Sayaka's head. Kyouko saw her coming and started raising her spear to intercept Homura's approach, but Sayaka's shield slid along the shaft of her spear and she rammed it into Kyouko's side, stopping her counter in time for Homura to deliver a _hard _axe kick right to the top of her head.

Kyouko's face hit the dirt in a cloud of dust, and immediately blood splattered out onto the ground. Homura suddenly looked a little worried. "...I think I kicked her a little too hard."

"You think?!" Sayaka looked at her. "...Are you alright?"

Suddenly, a hand shot out onto Homura's shoulder. Slowly, Kyouko rose up, blood leaking from her forehead. She had a wide, sadistic grin as she stood. "Never _better."_

Homura was blindsided by the uppercut.

[=]

Madoka left Sayaka's apartment building bewildered. "...What the heck was that all about?"

"Lies. Simple as that." Madoka turned as soon as she heard the new voice.

"Kyubey?"

"Hello again, Madoka." The white creature appeared next to her, like he just happened to stroll by.

"Do you, um… Would you happen to know where Sayaka is?" Madoka asked. She couldn't help feeling a little worried. She saw Sayaka yesterday at school, and she had been acting a little… off. And Madoka was curious about how her new partnership with Homura was going. But apparently she hasn't been home in a few days? How come she hadn't told her?

"Are you asking for her location, or what body her soul currently resides in?"

"Um… huh?"

[=]

Homura head snapped backwards from the force of the blow, making her stumble "Homura!" Sayaka shouted before she grabbed the shield. In one fluid motion, she tried out the timestop...and immediately, everything froze. She saw that Kyouko was about to swing at her with the polearm again…

"Yeah, no." She walked up to it, yanked the spear out of her hands, and promptly replaced it with something more appropriate. "There!"

She ran off, taking note of the dust being kicked off of the ground before she crossed her arms and let time run again.

And when it did, Kyouko swung at absolutely nothing with a rubber ducky. "What the fuck?" She asked, before Homura recovered and punched her in the gut, then slammed the sides of her head with the hilts of two swords. Immediately, Kyouko's ears started ringing, and she shouted. "What the hell are the _rules?!"_

"I dunno." Sayaka said, feeling happy that she had put the rubber duck into the shield earlier for fun. "I didn't think of anything."

Homura rolled her eyes. "We fight until one of us is out cold."

"...Oh, that's it?" Kyouko smirked. "Cool." And just like that she exploded with movement, rushing at Sayaka head-on. Sayaka flinched at the flash of red, grabbing her shield to protect herself, only to have her hand slapped away by a polearm. "Gonna have to do better than _that!" _

"...Oh ba-" Sayaka was hit in the face by a punch, and was sent tumbling backwards right into a tree, jarring it and sending leaves everywhere.

"I win." Kyouko said with a victorious grin, before she noticed Homura rushing towards her using a grindcore-powered leap. In one fluid motion, she slipped underneath, but was still blown off balance by the wind displacement. She stood still as dust and wind blew past her face. "...Holy _fuck."_

Homura slid across the ground after the leap, with dirt and debris flying around her face. "Not yet. She's still conscious."

"Oooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwww." Sayaka murmured. "Why is your body so _weak?"_

"Don't be such a baby." Homura muttered. She watched from the corner of her eye as Sayaka stood up, rubbing blood off her face and grimacing in pain.

"Homura, I propose a rule change." She said, glaring at Kyouko and reaching into her shield. Homura resisted smirking as she read Sayaka's mind, playing along.

"And what would that be, Sayaka?" Homura moved to flank Kyouko, who was looking between them suspiciously.

"We fight until _Kyouko_ is the one out cold." Both girls shared the same evil smile as they looked at Kyouko.

"I agree," Homura said. "Rule change granted."

"Oi," Kyouko's grin was much more wicked than theirs as she kept the other two in her sights, spear gripped tightly in her fingers. "We'll be here all day with that impossible rule. Also, you two are getting progressively creepier, you know that?"

"Not quite." Sayaka smirked, and Homura immediately brought out a sword.

In a split second, Kyouko ducked. A blade whizzed over her head, as it cut into a nearby tree. It was neatly sliced from its roots, and the rest of the tree fell to the ground with a crash.

"Shit!" She shouted, before a time-stopped knee to the gut stopped everything. Things seemed to freeze as she suddenly felt like she was punched a _thousand _times in the stomach. "Okay! Okay, I give!" She gasped as she fell to her knees grasping her stomach. "Fuck! That's _unfair!"_

"...Unfair for us or for you?" Sayaka asked proudly, before she raised a hand up to Homura. Without looking, the other girl also raised her hand.

And like that, they fist-bumped. Sayaka grinned at her and, in just one moment of clarity and cooperation, Homura returned it.

And it was then that Kyouko ruined the moment with a string of the dirtiest words she could think of.

[=]

**[MOID A/N]: I made the horrible mistake of buying Rogue Legacy...and taking Figure Drawing. And game design. And animation. And writing AsukaQuest. So yeah, that's my excuse as to why the update is slightly late-ish, though really the reason is probably along the lines of "Because I suck".**

**[a0w A/N] My excuse is- oh, a nickel!**


	6. Chapter 6

**[Chapter 6]**

In a vast and empty castle, there lived a King. The place was grimy and dark, without even the slightest hint of moonlight. Chains lined the walls and columns stretched from the ceiling to the floor. Rust covered everything that happened to have metal, and the smell of death wafted through the air. And yet, the king sat. It was engulfed in pitch-black armor, without eyes to see or a mouth to breath out of. It faced forwards, unmoving as it sat upon its enormous throne.

Then suddenly, it moved. It looked to the darkness and saw nothing. After several seconds of silent staring, it returned to its previous state, resting as it always did.

This time, it stayed frozen in place for minutes...and then a blur passed by its vision. It was a tiny blur, much like a mouse to his might and size. It rose from his chair slowly, and in one slow and deliberate motion, brought its foot down to the floor. There was a crash of thunder and a cracking of stone and tile as its boot crashed. Chains exploded from under its foot, stretching far and wide as he prepared to have its latest annoyance wiped out of existence.

But it was just then that said latest annoyance ran up his leg. Bits of its enormous armor was under the foot of a tiny little being as it soon reached his head. And it was then that he saw it; a little girl with blue hair, blue eyes, and a white cape. And she had two blue swords raised.

It swatted her out of the air just before she could deal any damage, sending her careening into a nearby wall. Suddenly, before the girl hit _anything, _she disappeared out of its vision. It looked around for the new interruption, before a fiery blast engulfed its right hand. It took a step back in reflex, its foot causing another explosion of chain and stone as soon as it happened, before its chest was peppered with mortar fire.

On the ground was the blue girl, bloodied and injured from the impact, but with someone else; this time with black hair and a purple dress. The King stumbled backwards, before it took its hands and prepared to fall forwards.

And its head was quickly met with fifteen RPG rockets at once. The head was completely obliterated by the force, and the King's body crashed to the floor, the two magical girls quickly jumping out the way.

At its corpse, the two girls just peered into the neckhole, then at each other. "Well done," Homura said, vaguely impressed. "I wasn't expecting you to kill it so quickly."

"Well, yeah," Sayaka said back, almost sheepishly. "You almost _bit it. _You're lucky I was able to freeze it."

"It was a foolish mistake on my part." Homura started absently healing her wounds, little circles of musical notes forming around her wounds. "Maybe your behavior's bleeding into me."

"Hey! I resent that!" It was then that they noticed that nothing was changing around them. "...Homura?"

"You're wondering why the labyrinth hasn't disappeared yet, aren't you?" She didn't need to read her mind to guess that one.

Sayaka nodded. "Uh, yeah."

They turned slowly to the decapitated body. And just as they did, it jerked. The back of the King's armor was bent out of shape, and _something _started leaking out of the neck. It was a red, fleshy substance, one that made Homura widen her eyes in surprise and Sayaka stick her tongue out in disgust.

When the back split open, car-sized bits of armor were sent flying. They hit the walls and floor with several explosions of dust and debris. Homura and Sayaka stared at the emerging pile of bone and gore as it slowly formed a much more recognizable shape.

"That's just _gross." _Sayaka said.

"I'm not one to agree with you often," Homura grimaced at the sight. "...But you're right. That's gross."

It cried out before it crawled out of the armor. Even out of the enormous King's body, the Witch was still enormous, stretching over them as a glassy skin covered the body within just seconds. It finished its transformation, becoming a strange, kaleidoscopic snake. When it screamed, it sounded like crashing glass, and when it coughed, blood flew from its mouth.

"Ever encounter _this _one?" Sayaka shouted.

"No," Homura said. "I can assure you. This is just as new to you as it is to me."

Sayaka blinked at her. Then she turned to the witch. It screamed again, and she saw spinning blades of glass inside of its mouth. "Okay!" She raised the shield, before her eyes widened. "Crap. Not enough magic!"

In a split second, it rushed towards her, and just as she leaped to dodge, Homura charged forwards to take the hit. She blocked it with a shield of blades, and on impact the witch's head was flattened by its own momentum. Glass and blood flew everywhere as it reeled in pain, before Homura did a rapid spin and sliced the head off.

It went flying into the air as the body fell limply to the ground, and Sayaka wasted no time in ripping out a new weapon. Homura had to cover her ears as the sound of a very loud buzzsaw echoed through the dungeon, and bits of shredded glass and flesh rained down as the Labyrinth disintegrated around them.

"There!" Sayaka grinned. "Finally got a handle on those weapons of yours!"

"...Why are you using that?" Homura asked. "The ammunition for that is hard to find."

"Yeah, so?" Sayaka raised the gun. "It's so _pretty! _Six barrels!"

"It also eats ammunition." Homura sighed. "You should know better by now."

"Still, you can't deny the fact that it did a nice job of shredding that witch's head."

"I can't," Homura sighed. "But you're still an idiot."

"And you're a jerk." Sayaka said, flatly.

[=]

"I think we're ready," Sayaka said confidently some time later as they sat in a family restaurant. "For that Walrus night thing."

Homura looked skeptical. "There is no being ready for something like Walpurgis."

"Well, I think this is as good as we're going to get," Sayaka said. "Considering Walpurgis arrives a few days from now."

Homura just stared at her plate of fries, frowning. "I don't have a good feeling about this."

"You never have a good feeling about _anything_." Sayaka pointed out with her own french fry before popping it into her mouth.

"I mean about Madoka." Homura picked at her food. "I haven't kept a proper eye on her lately."

"I'm sorry our two weeks of training have cut into your stalking time," Sayaka deadpanned. "We do see her everyday at school."

Homura still looked unsatisfied. Sayaka could now recognize the slight unhappy twitch of her lip even without reading her mind. Living with/in a person will do that.

"How about we 'check up on her' after you finish eating." Sayaka compromised, pointing at Homura's full plate. "And by that, I mean we call her or go to her house and actually spend time with her. You know," She raised her hands and shook them dramatically. _"Socialize."_

Homura narrowed her eyes at her. "I socialize."

"Kyouko doesn't count." Sayaka said with a teasing grin.

Homura rolled her eyes. "Then… You?" She didn't mean the inquiry to sound so serious.

Sayaka paused and blinked. "Of course I don't count. It would only count if you considered me a friend…" Sayaka trailed off as the tiniest hint of a blush appeared _briefly_ on Homura's face. She probably imagined it. "Er… well, we are eating out together, so… that counts for something, I guess."

"Your system makes no sense." Over the past couple of weeks Homura had come to accept that while being stuck in Sayaka's headspace was _absolutely _the most horrific thing in the world, it also _wasn't_ the most horrific thing in the world, probably. And maybe she's even come to enjoy the company. Their dynamic at home was… to put it in a word, 'domesticated'.

Sayaka rubbed her tummy. "Hey, I'm impregnating you with my food baby. We're _closer _than friends."

Homura almost choked at the wording. That "tiniest hint" immediately turned into a very light pink. It was still hard to spot, but it was far easier to see now. "You're just making me fat," She grumbled, wanting to turn the tables. "And we'd have very dreadful children together."

Sayaka laughed out loud at that. Homura couldn't remember the last time she'd made someone laugh. "I hope so! According to Kyouko's plan, our thirty kids have to defeat Walpurgis!" Sayaka's mind conjured an army of babies taking down the witch for them.

Homura smiled despite herself. "You should never be allowed to reproduce, Sayaka."

"I don't know about that," Sayaka sipped from her drink. "I kind of want to have kids one day. What about you?" Homura's mood immediately took a nose dive and Sayaka froze as she felt it.

"We're magical girls, Sayaka." Homura said simply. "We're lucky to live tomorrow let alone look that far into the future."

"You're so morbid," Sayaka whined a little. "You need to be a little more positive! What do you plan on doing after we defeat Walpurgisnacht and save Madoka from her fate?"

Homura blinked at that. She had no idea how to answer that question. "Hearing you of all people telling me to be more positive is odd. You usually have a tendency to look at things with a glass half-empty perspective."

"Well, I kind of _have_ to look on the bright side now," Sayaka muttered, looking out the window. "If I don't, I'd go… crazy." She shuddered briefly at how literal that statement was. "But luckily I have you to keep me in check, right?"

Homura leaned back in her seat, watching the other girl. "Wow. You really _are_ looking on the bright side of things." She commented, not even condescendingly. She grabbed a french fry and ate it consideringly. "And you are lucky. I look out for my friends. Or at least I try to." Sayaka looked back at her, smile slowly growing to a grin on her face. "Shut up."

But Sayaka felt so happy she couldn't resist. "I'm your _friiiiiiiiend." _She stretched the word out. "I guess you _are _socializing after all!"

"Shut up."

"Oh man!" Sayaka laughed. "You're moving up in this world, Homura!"

"_Shut up."_

"Relax, I'm just teasing you." Sayaka said compliantly, not wanting to push her luck _too_ far.

"I still didn't like it."

"You really are a stick in the mud, you know that?" Sayaka grumbled, but she really couldn't keep the smile off her face. She's put up with a lot of crap to get to this point where Homura could finally count her among her friends! Sayaka felt like she should get some sort of scout badge for this accomplishment. The HomuFriendship Badge!

"Please stop thinking." Homura said without any actual bite to her tone. She was giving her fries a considering look. "To answer your question about what I'll do if we manage to defeat Walpurgisnacht," Homura was giving positive thinking a try. "We're definitely going to switch back."

"And if we don't?"

"We _will." _Homura corrected her, annoyed that Sayaka was shooting down her positive thought right after she decided to think positively.

"Fine. So what'll you do after we switch back?"

"Besides going on a diet?" Homura deadpanned, eyeing the hand Sayaka was sneaking into her plate.

"Don't even joke about that. You have a duty to keep our baby. As a symbol of our… er, bond?" Sayaka gestured between them vaguely.

Homura raised an eyebrow. "Are you still going on about that food-baby thing?"

Sayaka grinned stupidly. "Yes."

"You always did like beating dead things into the ground." Homura pictured stabbing Sayaka's hand with a fork. Sayaka's hand sheepishly shrunk away from Homura's plate.

"You haven't answered my question. What're you going to do after we switch back?" Sayaka said. She leaned forward in interest, putting her elbows on the table. She really had no idea how Homura would answer. The future beyond saving Madoka was just not something Homura thought about.

She knew this because, try as she might, Homura couldn't give her an answer. Not even in her _mind _was there an answer.

"...That's what I thought." Sayaka said, quietly. "You really do need a new focus."

"I'll cross that bridge when I get there." Homura said firmly. '_If I ever get there._' she could help adding in.

Sayaka exhaled in slight disappointment. "Fair enough. As for me, I'm going to eat tons of seafood. And sleep on a bed."

Homura just nodded. It was a stupid plan, but at least she actually had some sort of plan. She swallowed the last of her food and looked at Sayaka expectantly. The other girl smiled at her.

"Shall we head over to Madoka's then?"

"...Alright." Homura said. "I don't see why not."

[=]

Kyouko let another familiar go.

She watched from a rooftop as it scurried away like a rat that knew a cat was on its trail. She grinned to herself. Another easy grief seed for her collection. She leaped to the next rooftop to keep an eye on it. She usually just let it fester for a day or two, but with the newly formed dynamic duo patrolling nowadays, she didn't want to risk this familiar getting wiped out before it became a witch.

Because as much as the other two moaned and groaned about it, they were actually a pretty good team. Even if they did cheat on their stupid little sparring sessions. Kyouko made a mental note to remind herself to challenge Sayaka to a match without that weird power of hers.

"Seriously. That shit's overpowered." She murmured to herself, flexing her shoulders. She was a little sore from all the fights, but she enjoyed the feeling. Those two were the most fun she's had in a while!

She put them out of mind for now, focusing on stalking her prey.

[=]

"Well, ring the doorbell, Homura." Sayaka prompted, nudging Homura with her elbow.

"This is stupid. Can't we just stake out her house and watch through her window like I usually do?" Homura grumbled, feeling uncomfortable standing in front of Madoka's big house out in the open.

"No, that would be creepy stalking."

"It's more efficient to keep an eye on Madoka if the Incubator isn't aware we're around." Homura reasoned.

"But that wouldn't be any fun!" Sayaka said as if that trumped anything Homura had to say. Sayaka felt Homura's displeasure leaking into her mind and she did her best to placate the time-traveler. "C'mon, you can't say no to any extra free time with Madoka, right? She is our best friend, if you haven't forgotten."

"Of course I haven't forgotten." Homura glared in Sayaka's direction briefly, before returning her sullen gaze to the doorbell. It offended her that Sayaka would even insinuate such a thing as forgetting that Madoka was her one and only friend. Or, she used to be her one and only friend, Homura corrected herself with a bit more agitation than necessary when it came to Sayaka. But that didn't change the fact that Madoka was still the most important person in the world to her. So why was she feeling so reluctant and defeated by this stupid doorbell?

Homura sighed, brushing Sayaka's short blue hair behind an ear. It was quickly becoming her new hair habit, since she couldn't flick it. She tried reaching over to flick Sayaka's hair once and the other girl had freaked out a little. "...You know what? Alright. Okay. I'll go."

"_That's _the spirit!" Sayaka pressed the doorbell, and immediately took a step back as the sound of footsteps approached the door. With a click, the door was pulled backwards, and a man stood before them.

"Oh, hi, Sayaka." Madoka's dad greeted with a pleasantly surprised smile.

"Hi, Mr. Kaname." Homura looked around. "So...is Madoka in?"

He nods. "Yup. She's upstairs right now." He turned his head a little. "A new friend of yours?" He was looking at Homura's body curiously.

"Uh...yes." Even _weeks _after the fact, she still had a rough time getting used to the fact that she had to call herself Sayaka.

"My name is Homura Akemi." Sayaka said as flatly as possible. Homura had to resist the urge to roll her eyes. "I am pleased to meet you."

"Pleased to meet you as well, Homura," he greeted with a smile. He moved aside and gestured for the two girls to come in. Sayaka stepped inside first, a little more versed in the way of the Kaname household than Homura, who stepped inside hesitantly.

"Madoka, your friends are here to see you!"

"Coming!" She says. With the sound of footsteps down the stairway, Madoka descended down the stairs before abruptly stopping to stared at the two with wide surprised eyes. "Oh...Sayaka. Homura."

"Hello." Sayaka says, and Homura just tries to wave. Instead, she blushes a little as she tries to keep herself waving normally.

"You girls can go ahead upstairs. I'll start some tea for you." Madoka's dad said with a friendly smile.

"Thank you," Homura said, inwardly sort of thrilled to have this sort-of social call, but it was really just checking up on Madoka to ensure her safety or something.

Something.

Yes.

_Something._

'You're totally using this as an excuse to stalk her.'

'Fuck you.'

'Come on, just admit it!'

'_Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck youuuuuuuuuuuuuuu.'_

'You've become more and more eloquent since I've known you, Homura.'

'You made me this way.'

'Oh yeah, because _everything_ is my fault!'

'Precisely.'

Madoka fiddled with her fingers, waiting for the weird pause to end. This had become a common occurrence between Homura and Sayaka. Madoka's dad wondered why the three of them were just standing there for a few seconds.

He cleared his throat. "I'm going to get back to making dinner, then."

"But we just ate." Madoka pointed out..

"That's okay. It'll be...uh..._double dinner!" _He ran off quickly, leaving everyone but Madoka confused.

"He wants us to spend time with each other." Madoka says rather sheepishly.

"I gathered." Homura muttered.

There was yet another awkward pause that gave Sayaka a brief burst of melancholy in her chest. If she were in her regular body, she'd just hug the crap out of Madoka and act normally with her. But no, she was stuck inside a popsicle and had to act like a popsicle. She really, really missed Madoka. But at the same time she knew Homura had felt like this every single day before they had switched bodies, and she had felt it to a greater degree. So she gave Homura a mental shove to do something.

A mental shove is somewhat akin to a physical one in that something stumbled out of Homura's mouth. "Er...May we come up?" Homura shot Sayaka an annoyed look. Luckily she had caught herself before she said anything stupid.

"Oh, yes, of course!" Madoka said, suddenly flustered by her lack of manners. She motioned for them to come up and they shared a look before following her.

Homura tried to keep her elation of going into Madoka's room under wraps to prevent Sayaka's inevitable teasing, but it surprisingly didn't come. Sayaka just felt happy as well.

However, that elation soon killed itself when they reached Madoka's room.

"Hello there!" Kyubey greeted jovially as he sat upon Madoka's bed.

Homura's eye twitched and Sayaka's teeth ground against each other. "Kyubey."

"Incubator."

"Homura. Sayaka." He says, and Madoka immediately notices that he first nodded at Sayaka's body, then at Homura's. The two guests stiffened as they glared at him, and Madoka was surprised by the shared intensity they radiated. In that moment she couldn't tell the two apart.

"Kyubey...you do realize-" Sayaka starts, before she's interrupted.

"I know exactly what I'm talking about." He says, quickly. His fluffy white tail swished slowly from side to side and they could've sworn he sounded smug.

"He…" Madoka hesitated as she looked at the ground uncertainly. "You've been keeping something from me, haven't you?" Her pink eyes finally looked up at them, hurt visible in her gaze but steady nonetheless.

Homura's instincts exploded in a million different directions at once, but Sayaka felt them cooling down quickly as Homura's amazing knack for adapting to an unexpected occurrence kicked in. She already had a lie on her lips in the span of a few seconds, and Sayaka couldn't help but feel inclined with that line of thinking. Her first knee-jerk reaction would be to deny everything, but…

Madoka was looking directly at her now with those big warm eyes. "Sayaka?" 'Crapcrapcrap-"

"We...uh…" Homura's eyes darted around as her mind latched onto one of her lies. "We're together."

Madoka gaped at her in surprise at the same time Sayaka's head snapped in her direction, violet eyes wide and glaring. _'WHAT.'_

Homura's expression was determined even as she started sweating. 'Look at it this way. If she thinks we're together then that means it'll look like we _were _hiding something.'

Sayaka blushed scarlet. 'Are you sure you don't actually feel something for-?'

'_No_, of course not. If I did, you'd be the first to know.'

'Unintentionally?' Sayaka murmured, before an image flashed in her mind. 'THAT WASN'T MINE.'

'Not mine either!' Homura was becoming progressively flustered at their mental conversation. 'Jeez, you're attractive but not _that _attractive!'

'...Did you just call me attractive?'

'Uh...wait. Nonono-!'

'You've spent _how _much time looking at my naked body in the mirror?' Sayaka asked in horror as the thoughts flitted through Homura's mind.

Madoka stared at the two of them. They seemed to be glaring at each other, though they both had heavy blushes. She wasn't sure what to say beyond articulating how random this news was to her. "...I uh...I'm happy for you?" She murmured. She didn't think _this_ was the reason for the pair's odd behavior.

"Uh...yes!" Sayaka said quickly. "We...uh...it happened recently. We're an awkward couple."

'Awkward? You got that part right.'

'Shaddup! This was _your _plan!''

Madoka tilted her head, still trying to wrap her head around this news. "I don't know if you'll last that long together…" She mumbled, before she quickly realized that she had just something incredibly rude _out loud. _"I...uh...I mean you two are cute together and there's nothing wrong with that and I'm with a girl and-!"

Sayaka and Homura turned their surprised faces back to her. "You're with _who?"_

"Uh...Homura?" She looks at Sayaka. "You introduced me to her a while back." She murmured, reminding Sayaka of the girl that had a crush on Madoka. "...Naoko. Yashima. Glasses. Cute." She blushes.

Sayaka can't help the surprised look on her face. "Eh? Really?" She glanced at Homura nervously, noting that the other girl's mind had gone eerily silent with this news. "Erm… Congratulations," Sayaka offered awkwardly.

"Oh! Yes, you too!' Madoka was blushing intensely as she reached up to play with one of her pigtails. "Sorry… I'm just really surprised to hear about your relationship! But," Madoka tried for a bright smile. "I think I can support you two!"

"Uh, thanks." Sayaka said, and Homura just stayed very quiet throughout the exchange.

There was a knock on the door that startled them. "Madoka, the double dinner is ready!" It was Madoka's dad.

"Thanks!" Madoka said, before she gave them both a tiny little smile and left the room. Sayaka and Homura were left standing there for a few moments. Sayaka tentatively reached out to Homura in her mind.

"You alright?"

The corner of Homura's lip trembled.

"Uh…"

It twitched some more and she bit down on it, barely suppressing an indiscernible noise. It was a mix between a scream and a dying badger. As though she was suppressing both her incredible rage towards Sayaka and her disappointment in herself for not making a goddamn move or keeping a closer eye on Madoka.

Sayaka cringed and turned her frustration to Kyubey, who had been sitting pretty this entire time. "What the heck was that, Kyubey?"

"I believe it's what you call outright lying to your friend," Kyubey said conversationally. Sayaka's fists clenched as her guilt complex was effectively pricked. "Do you really think she's not going to find out the truth of your situation sooner or later? You two might even be able to switch back if she knew. Provided she makes a contract with me."

"Over my dead body." Homura said without skipping a beat.

"Do you not want her to fix your predicament?" He asked.

"We don't want her dying because someone like you thinks it's in our best interest to have her sell her _soul _to a _plush toy." _Sayaka tugged at Homura's wrist. "C'mon Homura, let's go eat."

Wordlessly, she followed Sayaka downstairs.

"You can't run away from this forever. She _will _find out." Kyubey said confidently, ears flicking atop his furry little head.

"Yeah, sure." Sayaka said back. "Whatever."

Head whirling in a cloud of dark thoughts, Homura trudged down the stairs. Sayaka was beside her, sparing her worried glances. "I'm sorry it turned out like this," she said honestly, referring to Madoka suddenly dating the girl Sayaka had teased Homura with. She didn't expect anything to come of it, and now she felt really guilty.

Homura just stayed silent.

"Hey, we're still good," Sayaka said quietly as they approached the Kaname kitchen. "Madoka still doesn't know. Walpurgis is just a few days away. We can make it. Everything is still under control." Sayaka said to try and calm the other girl in some way.

"If everything is still under control…" Homura muttered. "Then why do I still feel gutted?"

Sayaka felt her acute feelings of pain and frustration flashing through her mind. "I...hm." She took a deep breath. "...I can sympathize."

Homura glanced briefly at her, understanding. "Kamijou?"

"Yeah," Sayaka ran a hand through her dark hair. "Kamijou. Look...let's talk it over back at your house, alright? We don't want to keep Madoka waiting."

Homura nodded absently, mentally swallowing her feelings so that she could endure facing Madoka properly.

[=]

**[Moid A/N]: Well, there was a things and you know how a little birdie told me to go somewhere else briefly to work on things well imagine that if you can **_**catch my cold. **_**[a-choo]**

**[a0w A/N]: So how about the new trailers for the third movie? I don't know what the crap is going on, but I do know that Sayaka is going to stick her sword in Homura's you-know-what and stir up her gears something fierce!**


End file.
